Some people think children’s spending time on TV, video and PC games is good,while others think it is bad. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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this

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modern era,

Children

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's screening

time

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has

became

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become

show examples

a debatable topic. Some proponents argue that watching

Use synonyms

videos

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and PC games is harmful

for

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show examples

kids

Use synonyms

while

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others reject

this

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notion. In

this

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essay,

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will analyze both views and give my opinion.

This

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essay will provide examples to demonstrate my ideas and a conclusion.

To begin

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with,

Children

Use synonyms

's watching

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and

videos

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carry some drawbacks but the predominant is that enjoying

videos

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and

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can cause health problems

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apply

show examples

them

Correct pronoun usage

apply

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, as they will not indulge in any physical activity

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apply

show examples

which

Correct word choice

and

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they can become obese.

Moreover

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kids

Use synonyms

will not feel comfortable in social interaction. They will like to stay alone and become

cracnky

Correct your spelling

crazy

if someone

will try

Wrong verb form

tries

show examples

to talk or play with them.

For example

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, a newspaper published a survey showing that working parents are not able to give proper

time

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to their

kids

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and almost sixty percent

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children

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of children

show examples

do not like to socialize with people.

On the other hand

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, the positive impact of

this

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idea cannot be ignored. By watching

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and PC games

children

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will become more creative and

sharp minded

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sharp-minded

show examples

Change preposition

show examples

add

Replace the word

addition

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, Watching

videos

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on mobile

phone

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phones

show examples

can help them to learn new languages and skills which can be helpful for them in future.

Apart from

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this

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, parents can get some

time

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to relax after

Correct article usage

show examples

the

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show examples

Replace the word

tiring

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tired

Correct word choice

tiring

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working day. To provide an example,

kids

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watching video games are more active than their counterparts who do not spend

time

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Correct pronoun usage

their phone

show examples

phone

Fix the agreement mistake

phones

show examples

Use synonyms

To conclude

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, the idea of watching

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and

videos

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online

have

Correct subject-verb agreement

has

show examples

their

Correct pronoun usage

its

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pros and cons, it depends on the parents

that

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and

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how they like their

kids

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to get connected with these online

videos

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baljeetkhehra11318Wed May 22 2024

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grammar

Consider proofreading your essay to correct small grammatical errors, such as the misuse of capitalization and articles. Improvements here can make your writing clearer and more professional.

examples

Work on making your examples more specific and directly related to the points you're making. This can help strengthen your arguments and make them more convincing.

cohesion

Improve the logical flow between sentences and paragraphs. Use more linking words and phrases to ensure your ideas connect smoothly and logically.

task achievement

You have effectively presented both sides of the argument, demonstrating a balanced approach to the essay topic.

structure

The introduction and conclusion are clearly stated, providing a framework for your discussion.

examples

You have introduced relevant points and supported them with examples, which is crucial for a well-developed essay.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
23
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

279 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

cognitive development
educational opportunities
technical skills
digital future
cultural exposure
screen time
physical health
obesity
eye strain
violent content
inappropriate content
parental supervision
setting boundaries
behavioral impact
mental health

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Some people think children’s spending time on TV, video and PC games is good,while others think it is bad. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people think that the government is responsible for the rise in obesity in children. While other people think it is the fault of the parents. Discuss both side and give your opinion

Some people believe that professionals such as doctors and engineers should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both views and give your own answers.

Modern children are suffering from the diseases that were once considered to only be meant for adults. Obesity is a major disease prevalent among children. What are its causes, and what solutions can be offered?

Some people think that is better to work alone and others think that is better to work in a team. Which do you prefer? Give reasons and details to support your opinion.