Some people say that now we can see films watching movies at home is easier and there is no need to go to the cinema. Others say that to be fully enjoyed, movies need to be seen in a cinema. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Developing technology and getting modern gadgets have made our
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
easier, so we are living in a more luxurious world
compare
Wrong verb form
compared
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to the past. There
is have
Wrong verb form
are
show examples
people
prefer
Correct pronoun usage
who prefer
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watching movies at
home
, thinking that it is more comfortable, despite others
think
Wrong verb form
thinking
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that
cinema
makes films more thrilling. The impending essay will discuss both these views and show
advantages
Correct article usage
the advantages
show examples
and drawbacks of these opinions.
Firstly
one of the main advantages of being at
home
is comfort. Definitely modern technology
gave
Wrong verb form
has given
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us enough opportunity to create our own
cinema
at
home
by buying comfortable
furnitures
Change the wording
furniture
types of furniture
pieces of furniture
items of furniture
show examples
,
plazma
Correct your spelling
plasma
Plazma
Tvs
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TVs
show examples
,
getting
Correct word choice
and getting
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good
Correct article usage
a good
show examples
music system, so it is easier to shape your own space. It is better to watch a
movie
in a comfortable position because you don't need to sit for hours like in a
cinema
.
Secondly
,
home
supply
Correct subject-verb agreement
supplies
show examples
us a great flexibility because there is no need to schedule your time, you can watch the film whenever you want.
Also
watching movies at
home
can be a big social event by inviting your close friends,
sharing
Correct word choice
and sharing
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your opinions about
movie
Add an article
the movie
show examples
.
In addition
to the ideas that
was
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were
show examples
shown
above
Add a comma
above,
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there
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
also
have
Unnecessary verb
apply
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some drawbacks
of
Change preposition
to
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looking at a
movie
at
home
compared to being in
cinema
Add an article
the cinema
a cinema
show examples
. Going to the
cinema
is not only an action
,
Add the word(s)
, but
show examples
it is
also
an experience
,
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apply
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because watching a
movie
with
a complete strangers
Correct the article-noun agreement
complete strangers
a complete stranger
show examples
and seeing their reactions through the
movie
makes it more amusing.
Also
listening
other
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to other
show examples
people's
laughters
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laughter
waves of laughter
touches of laughter
peals of laughter
show examples
or shocked expressions about the
movie
make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
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you
gave
Wrong verb form
give
show examples
more attention to
movie
Add an article
the movie
show examples
and makes it more
insteresting
Correct your spelling
interesting
. But
unfortunately
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unfortunately,
show examples
cinemas are very expensive and today's circumstances
makes
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make
show examples
it more difficult
going
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to go
show examples
outside with your family or friends.
For instance
, in my country
common
Correct article usage
the common
show examples
price for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
tickets is 10 manat,
therefore
price
Add an article
the price
show examples
for
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
family of three
will be
Wrong verb form
is
show examples
30 manat
that
Correct word choice
which
show examples
it
Correct your spelling
is
show examples
considered expensive for us. In conclusion,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
think that
whatching
Correct your spelling
watching
a film at
cinema
Add an article
the cinema
show examples
is a better option to feel emotions completely
Add the comma(s)
,
show examples
however
,
nevertheless
looking at films at
home
is more selectable when you think about comfort and price.
Submitted by eminesixaliyeva on

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task achievement
Ensure to clearly state your thesis in the introduction and provide more structured arguments. For example, start with a sentence like: 'This essay will discuss both perspectives and will argue why watching films at home is more advantageous.'
coherence cohesion
Try to provide clearer transitions between paragraphs and arguments to enhance the logical flow of your essay, for instance, use phrases like 'on the other hand' to juxtapose contrasting views.
task achievement
Be cautious about grammatical and spelling errors to improve readability and professionalism, for instance, 'whatching' should be 'watching', 'plazma' should be 'plasma', and 'insteresting' should be 'interesting'.
coherence cohesion
The essay is well-organized, with paragraphs dedicated to each viewpoint. This type of structure helps in maintaining clarity.
task achievement
You have provided specific examples to support your arguments, such as discussing the cost of cinema tickets in your country. This adds depth to your essay.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • streaming services
  • on-demand
  • home entertainment
  • cost-effectiveness
  • concessions
  • immersive experience
  • social environment
  • film revenue
  • visual effects
  • nostalgia
  • memorable experiences
  • 3D
  • IMAX
  • interactive seats
  • flexibility
  • accessibility
  • limited mobility
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