Art classes, such as painting and drawing, are as important to a child’s development as other subjects, so it should be compulsory in high school. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Nowadays, people always take science
subjects
to become serious in high
school
whereas
some individuals believe that many
art
classes
,
such
as painting and drawing,
make
Verb problem
play
show examples
a
Change the article
an
show examples
important role in the development
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
other
subjects
and must have
had
Add a missing verb
been had
show examples
in high
school
. The writer of
this
essay
agree
Change the verb form
agrees
show examples
with
this
statement and will talk
some
Change preposition
about some
show examples
benefits when you study and practice
this
subject
. When you enjoy studying
art
classes
,
this
is a better chance for you to develop yourself.
Firstly
, experience
this
Change preposition
in this
show examples
subject
can help you
more
Add a missing verb
be more
show examples
flexible and careful in all of
work
Add an article
the work
show examples
you do in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
life. During your study time, you will be training every day to improve yourself.
Besides
that, to become a good artist,
this
Change the determiner
these
show examples
subjects
require you must have some good character that
provide
Change the verb form
provides
show examples
for your study
such
as meticulous or careful.
Secondly
,
this
subject
can help you improve your thinking ability,
therefore
,
this
is the important reason that can provide for other
subjects
in
school
. It can be seen that some children who
good
Add a missing verb
are good
show examples
at painting or drawing usually have a good brain to think and they can look to find some problems they had got in some other
subjects
by the time they
drew
Wrong verb form
draw
show examples
some small details in their
paiting
Correct your spelling
painting
paintings
. To be honest,
art
classes
should be compulsory in high
school
. The special thing that
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
only in
this
subject
that
Add a missing verb
is that
show examples
children are comfortable
to create
Change the verb form
creating
show examples
and
design
Wrong verb form
designing
show examples
their
paiting
Correct your spelling
paintings
.
This
is a good way for them to entertain
after
Correct pronoun usage
themselves after
show examples
school
,
then
it
make
Verb problem
plays
show examples
a
Change the article
an
show examples
important role in the development of creativity
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
students. They are comfortable
to think
Change the verb form
thinking
show examples
and
design
Wrong verb form
designing
show examples
something that
appear
Change the verb form
appears
show examples
in their brain,
therefore
,
this
choice can help children more and more adore studying
this
subject
.
Besides
that, when
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
show examples
trained
Wrong verb form
train
show examples
and
studied
Wrong verb form
study
show examples
good
Change the word
well
show examples
at
art
,
you
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
will get
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
opportunities
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
get a better job in the future. In conclusion,
art
classes
make
Verb problem
play
show examples
the
Correct article usage
an
show examples
important role in the improvement of
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
show examples
in all of categories
school
Fix the agreement mistake
schools
show examples
.
This
is a good way for
student
Add an article
a student
the student
show examples
to improve their brain or
a
Change the article
an
show examples
opportunity to get a job in the future,
therefore
, that
subject
should be compulsory in schools.
Submitted by [email protected] on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

clear comprehensive ideas
Try to enhance the clarity of your ideas. Some sentences are a bit hard to follow and could benefit from simpler structures and clearer connections between ideas.
relevant specific examples
Include more specific examples to support your points. For instance, mentioning specific studies or real-life examples could make your argument stronger.
complete response
You have addressed the prompt well, providing a reasonable response to the topic.
introduction conclusion present
You have a clear introduction and conclusion which helps frame your essay well.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • creativity
  • innovation
  • emotional wellbeing
  • mental health
  • fine motor skills
  • eye-hand coordination
  • self-expression
  • self-esteem
  • critical thinking
  • problem-solving skills
  • cultural awareness
  • inclusivity
  • academic performance
  • artistic activities
  • complement
  • enhance learning
What to do next:
Look at other essays: