Some people think that sports involving violence such as boxing and martial arts should be banned from TV as well as from international sports competition. what is your opinion?

#people #sports #violence #arts #tv #competition

There is no doubt that these

dayes

Correct your spelling

days

sports

became

Wrong verb form

have become

show examples

more popular than ever,and can be seen

from

Change preposition

apply

show examples

every where specially kids and

children's

Change noun form

children

show examples

.on

or social

medie

Correct your spelling

media

,network and even in a life

ground

Fix the agreement mistake

grounds

show examples

like schools l or after schools

club

Fix the agreement mistake

clubs

show examples

. In terms of the ability

Change preposition

show examples

reaching

violence

Replace the word

violent

show examples

sports

Change preposition

show examples

Add a comma

tv,

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it's more

danger

Replace the word

dangerous

show examples

to kids

Correct quantifier usage

apply

show examples

because it could be effective for them and can lead to reacting

those

Change preposition

to those

show examples

movment

Correct your spelling

movements

without realizing it could be

harm

Replace the word

harmful

show examples

for

Change preposition

show examples

theme

Correct your spelling

them

show examples

and cause a

serous

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serious

show examples

long term

Add a hyphen

long-term

show examples

damge

Correct your spelling

damage

However

, we cannot

banned

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ban

show examples

it from

Correct your spelling

show examples

socile

Correct your spelling

social

media's

Change noun form

media

show examples

channel

Fix the agreement mistake

channels

show examples

because there is another society in the universe

who

Correct pronoun usage

that

show examples

can release it has a different view and can

knows

Change the verb form

know

show examples

the

harm

Replace the word

harmful

show examples

moves from the

unharm

Correct your spelling

unharmed

moves. In my opinion,

thers

Correct your spelling

there

is no need to

banned

Wrong verb form

ban

show examples

violencr

Correct your spelling

violence

sports or martial arts from

Correct your spelling

show examples

instead

Add a comma

instead,

show examples

we should put

Change the article

show examples

age line on the same

Correct your spelling

show examples

channel and

warning

Wrong verb form

warn

show examples

them about the dangers

Correct your spelling

of TB

this

program

Fix the agreement mistake

programs

show examples

and kids

Verb problem

apply

show examples

bannding

Correct your spelling

banning

banding

from watching it because it's not suitable and parents should be aware of the warning and be carefully for what

shoing

Correct your spelling

showing

on the

Submitted by anhar55255 on Wed May 22 2024

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task achievement

Your essay addresses the main points of the prompt, but it could be improved by providing more detailed arguments and specific examples to support your opinion.

coherence cohesion

Try to develop your ideas more clearly and make sure each paragraph focuses on a single point. This will help your essay to be more organized and easier to follow.

coherence cohesion

Pay attention to spelling and grammar, as there are several errors that might confuse the reader. Proofreading your essay before submission can help you catch these mistakes.

task achievement

You clearly express your opinion about the topic and provide a balanced view of arguments both for and against banning violent sports from TV.

coherence cohesion

The structure of your essay is generally clear, with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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3Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
43Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

189 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people think that sports involving violence such as boxing and martial arts should be banned from TV as well as from international sports competition. what is your opinion?

Fully explain your ideas

Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS

Fewer and fewer people today write by hand using a pen, pencil or brush. What are the reasons for this? Is the decline in writing by hand a positive or negative development?

Some think that governments should support retired people financially while others believe they should take care of themselves. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people believe that universities shold only accept students with the highest marks while others believe that some students with low marks should have an opportunity. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people think that punishment is the best way of teaching children to behave well. Others believe that it is better to reward children for good be haviour. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some companies prefer people to work in the office, while others facilitate their employees to work from home. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+