Art classes, such as painting and drawing, are as important to a child's development as other subjects, so it should be compulsory in high schools. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

It is discussed that high schools must have
art
classes
as a compulsory subject because of its importance on a child's development as other subjects.
This
writer agrees with
this
statement and will show why
art
is very helpful in the future careers of children in the following essay.
To begin
,
art
lectures teach students about the joy of creation. It has been proved that drawing and painting can relieve stress in children's minds. Unlike maths or physics, painting or drawing do not require
much attempt
Change the quantifier
many attempts
show examples
to learn, so
art
classes
can be seen as break times for students after the efforts they put into other subjects but still involve education .
Furthermore
, by attending
art
classes
, students will
also
improve their cooperative and social skills thanks to teamwork tasks.
For instance
, criticizing each other paintings can be a good beginning of relationships.
Moreover
, it cannot be denied that people are tending to find artistry in all things. There are some examples like people always being attracted by artists' masterpieces, artistic goods, models and so on. Doing
art
can
also
improve our brains in analysing and organisational skills, fostering our talents, imagination and creativity that will be useful in the future because they can be applied to the majority of jobs in the world. To summarise,
art
classes
play an important role in not just training children's skills but
also
in constructing a friendly and happy environment for the learning process.
That is
why it should be obligatory in high schools.
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task achievement
Your essay largely stays on topic and addresses the prompt effectively. However, adding a few more specific examples would strengthen your points. For instance, you could refer to studies or anecdotes that show how art programs have positively affected students' lives.
task achievement
While your ideas are clear, using a wider range of vocabulary and sentence structures could make your essay more compelling. Try to use synonyms and advanced vocabulary where appropriate.
coherence cohesion
For better cohesion, try using more transitional phrases and connectors between your ideas and paragraphs. Words like 'however,' 'moreover,' and 'consequently' can help your essay flow more smoothly.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are well-presented and effectively frame your essay.
coherence cohesion
Your main points are logical and well-supported, creating a strong argument for making art compulsory in schools.
task achievement
Your response is complete and addresses all parts of the prompt, which shows a good understanding of the topic.

Your opinion

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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • enhances
  • creativity
  • imagination
  • innovatively
  • curriculum
  • mental health
  • emotional expression
  • stress relief
  • critical thinking
  • problem-solving skills
  • creatively
  • cultural diversity
  • artistic traditions
  • compulsory
  • well-rounded education
  • academic performance
  • concentrate
  • attention to detail
  • persevere
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