It is nowadays seen that many students are part-time employed. Discuss advantages and disadvantages

#students

My name is Sherzod. To be honest I am not prepared

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for

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this

topic. That's why It is too difficult for me to write something. I guess You will understand my situation

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apply

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because I really need to get Ielts at least

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a 6

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score

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scores

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. The main reason is I have

responsibility

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a responsibility

the responsibility

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to my family, I have to

ern

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earn

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money, a

lot

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lot of

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money.

Submitted by makemoneyizzy16 on Fri May 24 2024

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task achievement

For Task Achievement, it's important to provide a complete response to the prompt. Make sure to address both the advantages and disadvantages of part-time employment for students.

task achievement

Clarity and comprehensive ideas are vital. Your argument must be clear and easy to understand. Make sure to use relevant specific examples to support your points.

coherence cohesion

For Coherence and Cohesion, it is important to have a logical structure in your essay. Start with an introduction, followed by body paragraphs discussing advantages, then disadvantages, and conclude with a conclusion summarizing your points.

coherence cohesion

Ensure that your introduction clearly states what the essay will discuss, and your conclusion effectively summarizes the main points.

coherence cohesion

Supporting main points with logical reasoning and examples helps in linking your ideas together, making your essay cohesive.

positive

It is good that you were honest about your situation. This is crucial for self-improvement.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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1Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Grammar mistakes
 

1 paragraphs

61 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

tuition fees
educational institutions
higher education
social classes
free higher education
student loans
scholarships
funding models
financial burden
publicly funded
privately funded
online education
MOOCs (Massive Open Online Courses)
investing in education
economy
individual livelihood
commercializing
academic integrity

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It is nowadays seen that many students are part-time employed. Discuss advantages and disadvantages

Include an introduction and conclusion

People nowadays tend to have children at older ages. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people believe that nowadays we have too many choices. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some cities ban private cars from entering the centre and force people to use bicycles and buses. Do the advantages of this policy outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people think that robots are important for human's future development. Others think that robots have negative effects on society. Discuss both views and give your opinion.