It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives.

It is
necessity
Replace the word
necessary
show examples
for persons to take risks in their professional and personal lives. The
risk takers
Add a hyphen
risk-takers
show examples
may
get failure
Verb problem
fail
show examples
initially
,
however
, I believe that later on they achieve
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
success. The essay will discuss both merits and demerits and argue it. There are advantages for
risk takers
Add a hyphen
risk-takers
show examples
in their lives. Some people take
risk
Fix the agreement mistake
risks
show examples
while
working at
office
Add an article
the office
an office
show examples
. They change their stable job and join other
company
Fix the agreement mistake
companies
show examples
for the sake of money and other benefits.
On
Change preposition
In
show examples
first
Change the article
the first
show examples
stage, they disturb their family
life
and move to other places.
Subsequently
, settle down
Change preposition
in at
show examples
at
Correct your spelling
a
show examples
new place. There are chances that they may regret their decision, but, later
on
Add a comma
on,
show examples
realize the value of
risk taking
Add a hyphen
risk-taking
show examples
in terms of financial stability and enhancing
life style
Correct your spelling
lifestyle
show examples
. Same way, some risky decision
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
personal lives
also
gives
secure
Correct article usage
a secure
show examples
, reliable and successful
life
.
For example
, many parents take
risk
Fix the agreement mistake
risks
show examples
and send their children
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
abroad
study
Fix the infinitive
to study
show examples
at
young
Add an article
a young
show examples
age.
Although
, there are a number of issues known by them
but
Remove the conjunction
apply
show examples
they think for better future of their wards.
On the other hand
,
sometime
Replace the word
sometimes
show examples
risk taking
Add a hyphen
risk-taking
show examples
can be
wrong
Add an article
a wrong
the wrong
show examples
decision. It may vanish
whole
Correct pronoun usage
my whole
show examples
life
. It has been seen that some people take significant
risk
Fix the agreement mistake
risks
show examples
in
stock
Add an article
the stock
show examples
market. They invest massive
amount
Fix the agreement mistake
amounts
show examples
by taking
loan
Fix the agreement mistake
loans
show examples
or selling properties. They assume that
Stock
Correct article usage
the Stock
show examples
market can make them
richest
Correct article usage
the richest
show examples
in
short
Add an article
a short
show examples
span of time.
As a result
, they become bankrupt . As per research conducted by
University
Correct article usage
the University
show examples
of Japan in the year 2023. a number of new investors who invested in
stock
Add an article
the stock
show examples
market during corona by taking
risk
became poor and lost everything. In conclusion,
at
Change preposition
to
show examples
some extent taking
risk
Fix the agreement mistake
risks
show examples
may meet our future
goal
Fix the agreement mistake
goals
show examples
and
get
Verb problem
achieve
show examples
success,
nevertheless
, considering the
risk
factor, we should be ready for any challenges and adverse effects.
Submitted by ahv on

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task achievement
Your essay could benefit from clearer and more detailed examples that directly support your main points. Try to be more specific in your examples to make your arguments stronger.
coherence cohesion
Maintain a consistent structure throughout your essay. Ensure that each paragraph starts with a clear topic sentence that sums up the main idea of the paragraph.
coherence cohesion
Your conclusion effectively summarizes the main points of your essay and offers a balanced perspective.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Opportunities
  • Growth
  • Innovation
  • Challenges
  • Self-discovery
  • Resilience
  • Uncertainty
  • Consequences
  • Calculated risks
  • Stagnation
  • Regret
  • Comfort zone
  • Entrepreneurship
  • Adventurous spirit
  • Thriving
  • Failure
  • Mitigate
  • Reap the rewards
What to do next:
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