Many companies today sponsor sports as a way of advertising themselves. Some people think that this is a good thing for the world of sports. Others think this has disadvantages. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion

In the modern era, it is the best method for donor
sports
to advertise their
companies
. It is often argued that it is the most effective way for the
world
of
sports
while
others believe that
this
is the drawback of
sports
. There is a major drawback of too many advertisements in
sports
by donor
sports
. Viewers can be distracted and find it difficult to focus on the
athletes
in the match. It can take away the fun of watching
sports
and make it less exciting for fans.
For instance
, there have been many matches that were affected by advertising and caused people to miss out on good short screens. It is complex for people to enjoy the match.
Therefore
, the advertisement of donor
sports
will affect the quality of the match.
However
, both
companies
and
athletes
will have
beneficial
Replace the word
benefits
show examples
.
This
is because
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
the
company’
Change noun form
company
show examples
s
Correct your spelling
's
donors will get more financial and have a chance to
sale
Replace the word
sell
show examples
their products through the famous
athletes
.
In addition
, the
talents
Replace the word
talented
show examples
athletes
become popular with the
world
of
sports
.
For example
, Coca Cola sponsor in the
World
Cup has had a huge impact on fans because
this
is a
world
sporting event so they want to attract viewers around the
world
.
As a result
, sponsorship will create many beneficial opportunities for
companies
and
team
Fix the agreement mistake
teams
show examples
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
sports
. In conclusion,
although
many
companies
support
sports
to promote themselves. Some people argue that
this
as
Correct your spelling
is
show examples
good for
sports
while
others think it is negative for the
world
of
sports
.
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introduction conclusion present
Consider improving the introduction by providing a clear thesis statement that summarizes the main points of both views.
logical structure
Ensure smooth transitions between paragraphs to enhance the flow of the essay.
supported main points
Develop each point more comprehensively and provide clearer examples to support your arguments.
introduction conclusion present
Make sure the conclusion reiterates your position clearly and warns up your discussion effectively.
supported main points
Address grammatical errors and enhance vocabulary usage to make your points clearer.
complete response
You addressed both perspectives of the issue, which shows a balanced approach.
relevant specific examples
You provided specific examples to support your points, such as Coca Cola sponsoring the World Cup.

Your opinion

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Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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