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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

It is becoming more and more difficult to escape the influence of the media on our lives. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of living in a media rich society.

#influence #media #lives #society
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Usages and influence of
media
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 in our
life
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lives
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 and
society
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 have dramatically increased around the globe over the
last
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 few years. It has become a mandatory part of
people
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’s lives as
media
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 are everywhere. Youngsters are mostly influenced by
media
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 because of its numerous benefits.
People
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 of other age groups are
also
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 influenced by the
media
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. They are using
this
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 in the form of newspapers, television, radio and
internet
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the internet
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 to avail maximum advantages
such
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 as information dissemination, entertainment and latest updates of various promotions etc.
However
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, the increasing use of
media
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 has some detrimental effects on the
society
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. There is no doubt that
media
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play
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plays
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 a pivotal role in learning. A large number of
people
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 are using electronic
media
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 to complete their education
assignment
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assignments
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 and projects,
for instance
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, YouTube has a large volume of lectures in the form of videos to assist thousands of viewers.
Moreover
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,
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media
Correct article usage
the media
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 has a diversity of programs to entertain its target audience. It
also
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 helps them to increase their knowledge about current issues worldwide.
Media
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 often increase our awareness and inform
about
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us about
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 things that are happening around us.
Thus
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 it is a great tool to bring
people
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 together.
However
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,
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media
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the media
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 has
also
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 increased
people
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’s woes. In order to increase
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their rating
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rating
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ratings
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, they are more opted to portray negative news and bad aspects of
society
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 that
made
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make
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people
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 tense and
increased
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increase
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 their worries.
Furthermore
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,
people
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 are less perceptive to physical activities because they do not want to skip their favourite television show and
thus
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 they become lethargic
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which
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that
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which
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 makes them susceptible to
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illnesses
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illness
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illnesses
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such
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 as laziness, obesity and anxiety. Political
biasness
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biases
, monetary gaining and vengeance are often practices in some
media
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 and that has very detrimental effects on our
society
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.
To sum up
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, I would like to say
media
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 has more advantages that outweigh its disadvantages.
Media
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 make
people
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 independent and give them
freedom
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the freedom
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 to raise their
voice
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voices
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 against corrupt
perpetrator
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perpetrators
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 residing in government and private institutions.
However
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, students are more diverted to other issues highlighted by
media
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 than their focal point, which is education.
Submitted by makemoneyizzy16 on

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task response
Your essay generally addresses both the advantages and disadvantages of living in a media-rich society, which is great. However, you can improve the Task Response by providing more concrete examples that are specific and relevant to your points. Additionally, you might want to elaborate more on the disadvantages to balance the discussion.
coherence cohesion
While your essay is generally well-organized, it could be better if you added clearer topic sentences for each paragraph. This would enhance the logical flow of your ideas. Furthermore, linking phrases could be used more effectively to transition between points.
coherence cohesion
You have a clear and engaging introduction and conclusion, which frame your essay well.
task response
Your main points are supported adequately, and you cover a variety of aspects related to media influence, which shows a good breadth of understanding.

Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – advantages
  • Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • The main advantage is...
  • The disadvantage of this...
  • The main benefit...
  • Despite these advantages...
  • One possible drawback...

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