The table shows information and prediction regarding the change in the percentage of population aged 65 years and above in three countries.

#information #prediction #change #percentage #population #years #three #countries

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

The table illustrates the data of the population proportion who are more than or equal to 65 years old in three different countries in 1988,

2000

Correct word choice

and 2000

show examples

and the projection for 2030. The general overview is that, over the years, every country has increased the percentages of the population.

Moreover

Linking Words

Germany

Use synonyms

has always

responsible

Add a missing verb

been responsible

show examples

for the highest percentages of

poeple

Correct your spelling

people

aged 65 or above throughout the time.

According to

Linking Words

the table, it can be seen that

Germany

Use synonyms

took the major part of the ratio of

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

people aged 65 or above, accounting for 20.45%, followed by Canada and the UK with the figures being 16.32% and 14.23% respectively in 1988. Moving on to

Correct article usage

the next

show examples

12 years, in 2000, it is still

also

Linking Words

Germany

Use synonyms

that had the highest percentages over the rest, increasing to 25.32%.

Whereas

Linking Words

, Canada occupied 20.67% and the UK was responsible for 14.89% of the people aged more than or equal

Change preposition

to 65

show examples

Additionally

Linking Words

according to

Linking Words

the forecast for 2030,

Germany

Use synonyms

still be in the first with a figure of 30.42%. Canada and the UK will take the second the

last

Linking Words

place with the figures being 26.35% and 20.35% of the population.

Submitted by pnakasont on Sat May 25 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "according to".

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words germany with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "table" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 3 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "percentages" was used 3 times.

▼

6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

193 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6.5
band
The growing number of overweight people is putting a strain on the health care system in an effort to deal with health issue involved. Some people think that the best way to deal with this problem is to introduce more physical education lessons in school curriculum. To what extent you agree or dis agree?
Owing to the problem which the growing population of overweight causes to the health care system,some people think that a key to solving this issue is to have more sports and physical activities in school education.I completely agree with this statement as it is the best way to tackle this issue of deteriorating public health in relation to weight.
5
band
A group of people think that the penalty for each kind of crime needs to equal, another group says that before giving punishment wants to analyse the stimulantt and motivation of the crime. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
There are common beliefs such as every punishment for breaking low has to be the same, while others think that judgement systems should consider initiatives that force the convicts to do a particular crime. In my opinion, before judging someone for his or her wrong acts we must put ourselves in their spot and carefully make our perspective about the situation.
7
band
Individuals can do nothing to improve the environment. Only large companies and goverments can make a difference. What extent do you agree or disagree.
There has been controversy about whether governments should be responsible for making a difference or whether communities on their own are capable of taking care of the environment. I personally disagree with this notion and this essay explains the reasons before presenting a conclusion.
5
band
Some people say that now we can see films on our phones or tablets there is no need to go to the cinema. Other say that to be fully enjoyed, films need to be seen in a cinema. Disucss both these view and give your own opinions.
An increasing number of people believed that technology can gives oppurtunity to humans to enjoy watching movies at home while other argued that cinema makes films more authentic and interesting. In my point of view is even mobile phones, tablet or computer are easist and cheapest way to be entertained by films, there are still undeniably reasons to engage with cinemas which will be discussed in this essay.
9
band
Some people claim that museums and art galleries are not needed today because everyone can see historical objects or art works by computer. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
It is often believed that museums and art galleries have reduced their importance thanks to a computer which allows people to see valuable artworks from the past. I generally disagree with this, for they offer a unique experience that is not provided by the digital device despite its growing popularity.

The table shows information and prediction regarding the change in the percentage of population aged 65 years and above in three countries.

A group of people think that the penalty for each kind of crime needs to equal, another group says that before giving punishment wants to analyse the stimulantt and motivation of the crime. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Individuals can do nothing to improve the environment. Only large companies and goverments can make a difference. What extent do you agree or disagree.

Some people say that now we can see films on our phones or tablets there is no need to go to the cinema. Other say that to be fully enjoyed, films need to be seen in a cinema. Disucss both these view and give your own opinions.

Some people claim that museums and art galleries are not needed today because everyone can see historical objects or art works by computer. To what extent do you agree or disagree?