The crime rate among teenagers has increased dramatically in many countries. Why is this happening and what can be done to reduce it?
The misconduct rate among adolescents has amplified radically in many states. In
this
essay, I will shed light on the reasons and solutions as to why this
is happening.
It is a common fact that, in many Latin-populated countries
, the crime rates among minors have significantly risen due to
the excessive number of teen pregnancies and how they have led to bad parenting. The age of consent in Latin American countries
is only 14, meaning that a teenager can start a family with an adult at 14! Leading to a considerable number of childbirths by young mothers. When a mother is incapable of raising a child, the child grows up neglected and not capable of receiving love. Which certainly leads them to turn into the
life of crime. The circle of poverty is Correct article usage
a
also
a key player in the upbringing of a Latina, turning to such
a life. When a parent is poor, it will make the child poor as well, making sure that no one can escape the vicious loop of deprivation. Thus
, when a combination of teen mothers and a circle of poverty is happening around, it causes the teenager to be angry and infuriated at the world, consequently
turning into a criminal.
For starters, the one thing we can do to reduce the crime rates in Latino-based countries
is to increase the age of consent in Latin American countries
by raising it from 14 to at least 18–21. Next,
it is to consider getting financial aid from the rich people in Columbia, Venezuela, Costa Rica, etc. By getting monetary help, we are increasing the chances of a teenager staying in school, finishing their education, and getting a well-paying job. Lastly
, it is also
important to consider the fact that whoever, whether they are a rich or poor adult, corrupted or not, gets at least 3 years of prison time for grooming a minor. Because every action has its consequences, it is called the butterfly effect. The federal government of the United States of America takes good care of its citizens; why shouldn’t other countries
do the same?
In conclusion, it is safe to say that Latin countries
are currently living in survival mode, and day-by-day
, their lives get harder and harder. Whether it be teenage grooming or a circle of poverty, we should always be kind to other people, because you never know what might happen to you tomorrow.Correct your spelling
day by day
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task achievement
'Misconduct rate among adolescents has amplified radically in many states' could be better phrased as 'The crime rate among teenagers has increased dramatically in many countries.'
task achievement
'Teen pregnancies and how they have led to bad parenting' should be 'Teen pregnancies often result in young, less experienced parents who might struggle with effective parenting.'
task achievement
Reword 'When a mother is incapable of raising a child...' into 'When a young mother lacks the skills or resources to raise her child, the child may grow up neglected and feel unloved, potentially leading them towards criminal behavior.'
task achievement
Great job on outlining the problem and suggesting concrete solutions.
task achievement
Good use of specific examples related to Latin American countries to highlight the issues.
coherence cohesion
Clear structure with a defined introduction, body, and conclusion.
coherence cohesion
Logical transitions between paragraphs make the essay easy to follow.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example
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