IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

Price of bananas in four countries between 1994 and 2004.

#price #bananas #four #countries
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The given line graph demonstrates how much bananas cost in four nations from 1994 to 2004.
Overall
, it can be obviously seen that the price of
banans
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bananas
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 in Japan and
USA
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the USA
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 increased
throungout
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throughout
 the timeframe
while
 that of France and Germany went down.
Additionally
, all the countries ranked
as
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in
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same
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the same
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orders
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order
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 as the beginning in
banana’s
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banana
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 cost. Turing towards to the two regions which were witnessed an increased. As for Japan, the price of bananas went up rapidly from $1.9/
kg
 to
reached
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reach
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 a peak at almost $3/
kg
until
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in
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 1995, but
then
 it went down gradually to roughly $1.4/
kg
 in 2001 before growing up again to
at
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apply
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just above $2.5/
kg
 in 2004. Meanwhile,
USA
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the USA
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 began at around $0.9/
kg
 and increased slightly to $1.2/
kg
 in 1999 prior to remaining stable until 2004. Regarding the remaining
coutries
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countries
 with a decrease in
banana’s
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banana
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 cost, France and Germany started at
approxiamately
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approximately
 $1.5/
kg
 in the beginning, dropping down to roughly $1.3/
kg
 in 2000, respectively. In terms of France, it continued to decline to almost $1/
kg
 in 2003 before going up significantly to above $1.5/
kg
at the end
 of the period.
Likewise
, the price of bananas in Germany dropped
down
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apply
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and
be
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was
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 stable at around $1.2/
kg
 between 2002 and 2004.
Submitted by Nghỉ hè vui vẻ cả nhà on

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Spelling & Grammar
Be cautious with spelling and grammatical errors like 'banans', 'throungout', 'France and Germany went down', 'coutries', 'the price of bananas in Germany dropped down and be stable'. Always recheck your work to ensure precision and clarity in your writing.
Vocabulary & Varied Sentences
Some descriptions would benefit from greater variety in vocabulary and sentence structures. Try to avoid repetitive use of phrases such as 'dropped down' and 'went up'. Instead, consider alternative phrases like 'declined' or 'increased'.
Content Accuracy
The essay generally provides an accurate and comprehensive overview of the data presented in the graph, summarizing the key trends and differences between the four nations.
Introduction & Conclusion
The introduction and conclusion are well-structured, which helps in maintaining the overall coherence and cohesion of the essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • comparative price trends
  • upward trend
  • downward trend
  • significant price fluctuations
  • dramatic rise/fall
  • comparisons
  • highest/lowest prices
  • potential reasons
  • economic conditions
  • import/export taxes
  • agricultural policies
  • external factors
  • natural disasters
  • trade agreements
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