Fresh water has always been a limited resources in some parts of the world. Today, however, growing worldwide demand has made this a global problem. What are the causes of the increased demand, and what measures can government and individuals take to respond to this problem.

#water #resources #parts #world #demand #measures #government #individuals

In recent years, fresh

water

Wrong verb form

has been

show examples

restricted only in some particular places.

Thus

, some say that the demand

Change preposition

for

show examples

fresh

water

has become a global issue.

This

essay explains why

this

problem

rises up

Verb problem

exists

show examples

and what proposals

that

Correct determiner usage

the

show examples

government

responds

Replace the word

response

show examples

this

are

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

Firstly

, the main factor why

this

problem

happens is that

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

internet

technolgy

Correct your spelling

technology

such

as social media and TV allows people to clearly see the difference between developed and developing

countries

This

leads some of them to realize what

need

Change the verb form

needs

show examples

Wrong verb form

be done

show examples

to improve the entire earth, and they claim that

this

problem

should be considered and discussed more carefully.

Additionally

, since its situation has become quite harsh nowadays, people have to cope with it. Because of the

availablity

Correct your spelling

availability

reaching

Verb problem

apply

show examples

fresh

water

, individuals in some

countries

can only drink dirty

water

which

make

Change the verb form

makes

show examples

them get serious diseases. In order to solve

this

issues

Fix the agreement mistake

issue

show examples

government

Add an article

the government

show examples

requires

Wrong verb form

is required

show examples

to brainstorm some ideas. The easiest and fastest way to ease the

problem

providing

Change preposition

by providing

show examples

fresh

water

from developed

countries

. When they try to create a facility to change dirty

water

into clear

water

, it needs huge costs, workers, and time which

make

Correct subject-verb agreement

makes

show examples

it more serious.

For instance

, if a developed nation sends fresh

water

to a developing country, it takes around a week.

However

, it

needs

Verb problem

takes

show examples

more than a half year when they construct a machine to create fresh

water

Therefore

, sending

water

from developed

countries

is more effective, and

government

Correct article usage

the government

show examples

should do

this

. In conclusion, there are two reasons why the lack of fresh

water

in some parts of the

earch

Correct your spelling

earth

has been a crucial issue, so sending

water

from developed

countries

would be a possible solution.

Submitted by ryoga17.0325 on Tue May 28 2024

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task achievement

While the essay addresses the causes and solutions for the increased demand for fresh water, it needs more in-depth analysis and clearer examples. Try to provide more detailed explanations and a few specific case studies or data points to support your arguments.

coherence cohesion

Ensure that each paragraph clearly supports your main ideas and follows a logical order. The introduction and conclusion are present, but they could be more robust. Work on improving the flow between sentences and paragraphs.

language

Review your grammar and vocabulary to avoid small errors and make your writing more sophisticated. While minor errors don't drastically lower your score, greater linguistic accuracy and a wider range of vocabulary can make your writing more compelling.

task achievement

You tackled both causes and solutions well, ensuring that you responded to all parts of the task.

coherence cohesion

Your essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
21Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

278 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

limited resource
growing worldwide demand
industrial growth
water-intensive crops
prolonged droughts
usable water
water conservation
water efficiency
infrastructure
fixing leaks
water-efficient appliances
water waste
renewable energy sources
water footprint
transboundary water basins
water-stressed regions

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Fresh water has always been a limited resources in some parts of the world. Today, however, growing worldwide demand has made this a global problem. What are the causes of the increased demand, and what measures can government and individuals take to respond to this problem.

Include an introduction and conclusion

It is now possible for scientists and tourists to travel to remote areas with natural environments, such as the South Pole. Is this a positive or negative development?

Modern use of communication have reduced the amount of time for people to interact. This has negative impacts on social lives of people. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

The average standard of people's health is likely to be lower in the future than it is now. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

These days more fathers stay at home and take care of their children why mothers go out to work

Some people think that a sense of competition in children should be encouraged. Others believe that children who are taught to cooperate rather than compete become more useful adults. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.