IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4

discuss whether the adantage of nuclear energy outweigh the potential risks and environmental concerns

#adantage #energy #risks #concerns
In
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
contemporary society, the
energy
 which is made by nuclear material is a recurring argument.
this
 writer believes that the drawbacks of money consuming and increasing pollution
bynuclear
Correct your spelling
by nuclear
nuclear
 waste outweigh the advantages of decreasing carbon
doxide
Correct your spelling
dioxide
 emission. The most advantageous factor of nuclear power is
thar
Correct your spelling
that
 it needs
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
big
Correct word choice
large
show examples
 amount of money to construct.
In other words
,if it was not checked or rebuilt
anually
Correct your spelling
annually
, the safe would not
Add a missing verb
be albe
show examples
albe
Correct your spelling
able
 to ensure that the toxic chemicals
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
 released or not.
As a result
, money that
need
Change the verb form
needs
show examples
 to
spend
Wrong verb form
be spent
show examples
 on that
energy
 could make some nations, especially the poor
one
Correct pronoun usage
ones
show examples
,become budget deficit. The pollution which is caused by nuclear
energy
 is the point that
worth
Add a missing verb
is worth
show examples
 considering. It must be recognised that the reaction to produce
energy
 by nuclear
need
Fix the agreement mistake
needs
show examples
 to have toxic chemical elements. After a period of
using
Replace the word
use
show examples
, these chemicals need to be thrown away because of
the
Change the word
their
show examples
 inability to
br
Correct your spelling
be
 reused.
Thus
,
this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
pollutans
Correct your spelling
pollutants
pollutant
 lead to
radiovative
Correct your spelling
radioactive
radiative
 pollution, which can cause disorder or make the
surrounding
Fix the agreement mistake
surroundings
show examples
 become unhabitable if
thay
Correct your spelling
they
could not
Wrong verb form
cannot
show examples
 be treated in the right way.
For instance
, now there are 30 nations using
energy
 in total, but
just
Rephrase
only
show examples
japan
Capitalize word
Japan
show examples
 invested in storage in order to keep these
element
Fix the agreement mistake
elements
show examples
 in one special area forever and avoid spreading out.
However
, some people believe that using chemical elements to produce
energy
 so that fuel and coal will be no longer needed. Simply put, nuclear
energy
 does not emit gasses that harm
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the environment and individuals
such
 as
cardondioxide
Correct your spelling
carbon dioxide
, which is the factor of some serious
illness
Fix the agreement mistake
illnesses
show examples
.
This
maybe
Correct your spelling
may be
show examples
 true,
nevertheless
, the
radiovation
Correct your spelling
radiation
 of toxic chemicals can cause
handicapor
Correct your spelling
handicap or
handicap
 even cancer.
Consequently
, nuclear power is not really eco-friendly.
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logical structure
Your essay demonstrates an understanding of the topic, but it requires clearer organization. Consider improving your essay's logical structure by ensuring that each paragraph focuses on a single main idea. This will make it easier for the reader to follow your argument.
introduction conclusion present
You have an introduction and a conclusion, which is good. However, make sure that your conclusion provides a strong summary of your main points to leave the reader with a clear understanding of your argument.
supported main points
Enhance your use of specific examples and evidence in each paragraph to more strongly support your main points. This will help to clearly and comprehensively develop your ideas.
complete response
To address the task more completely, ensure that you provide a balanced discussion of both the advantages and disadvantages of nuclear energy. Currently, your essay focuses more on the disadvantages. A more balanced view will enhance your task response.
clear comprehensive ideas
Work on expressing your ideas more clearly by focusing on grammar and vocabulary. This will improve your overall coherence and cohesion, making it easier for the reader to understand your arguments.
relevant specific examples
Your essay presents relevant and specific concerns related to the topic, such as the environmental impact and financial costs of nuclear energy. This demonstrates an understanding of the potential risks associated with nuclear power.
introduction conclusion present
You have a clear introduction that outlines the main argument of your essay, and your conclusion reiterates your main points, providing a sense of closure. This structure helps guide the reader through your argument.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • greenhouse gases
  • global warming
  • climate change
  • initial costs
  • complex technology
  • catastrophic accidents
  • Chernobyl
  • Fukushima
  • hazardous
  • storage challenges
  • national energy security
  • foreign energy imports
  • thorium reactors
  • fusion energy
  • economic development
What to do next:
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