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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The given pie charts illustrate the proportion of water utilization for various demands in six places in the world.

The given pie charts illustrate the proportion of water utilization for various demands in six places in the world.
The given pie charts illustrate the proportion of
water
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 utilization for various demands in six places in the world.
General
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Generally
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 speaking, it can clearly be seen that the amount of
water
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 used for agriculture accounts for the majority in South
America
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,
Africa
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, Central
Asia
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, and South East
Asia
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,
while
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 in North
America
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 and
Europe
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, industrial uses the most
water
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. Regarding the percentage of
water
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 usage in South
America
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, South East
Asia
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,
Africa
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, and Central
Asia
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, agriculture dominates the purposes of using
water
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, at 71, 81, 84, and 88
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percent
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per cent
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 respectively.
However
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, domestic and industrial
water
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 only occupy the minority in the charts of
water
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 utilization. Central
Asia
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 and South East
Asia
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 have the same proportion, at 7
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percent
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per cent
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. Meanwhile, South
America
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 consumes 10
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percent
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per cent
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 more
water
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 than
Africa
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 does (19 compared to 9
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percent
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per cent
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) for households. Speaking of industrial use, the figure for South
America
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 doubles that of Central
Asia
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 (10 as in 5
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percent
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per cent
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),
while
Linking Words
 the figures for South East
Asia
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 and
Africa
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 are 12 and 7
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percent
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per cent
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 respectively. Turning to North
America
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 and
Europe
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, the proportion of
water
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 consumed for industrial purposes prevails over other demands, at 48 and 53
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percent
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per cent
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 respectively. For agricultural use, North
America
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 accounts for 39,
while
Linking Words
Europe
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 institutes 32
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percent
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per cent
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. Meanwhile, domestic use only takes up 13 and 15
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percent
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per cent
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 in North
America
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 and
Europe
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 respectively.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 100%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words water, america, africa, asia, europe, percent with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "give" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "proportion" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 3 times.
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