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Writing Samples /
Band 1

Some people say that tourism has many negative effects on the countries that people travel to. How true is this statement? What can tourists do to reduce the harmful effects of tourism on local cultures and environments? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own experience

#people #tourism #effects #countries #travel #tourists #cultures #environments
Some people believe that tourists can
provide
Verb problem
have
show examples
bad
Correct article usage
a bad
show examples
 impact
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the
country
 they
visited
Wrong verb form
visit
show examples
.
I'm totally disagree
Change the verb form
I totally disagree
show examples
 in my opinion I think it's useful and
improve
Correct subject-verb agreement
improves
show examples
 the
country
Change noun form
country's
show examples
 economy and culture.
Overall
tourism's
Change noun form
tourism
show examples
 can develop the Nation in many ways
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
such
, It
help's
Correct your spelling
helps
show examples
 people to accept others and
enhanced
Wrong verb form
enhancing
show examples
diversity
Correct article usage
the diversity
show examples
 of
public
Correct article usage
the public
show examples
.
Moreover
, it can establish new economic opportunities,
such
 as hotels, restaurants, shopping
center
Fix the agreement mistake
centers
show examples
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
etc . When I traveled to India for two weeks I realized the amount of money that I spent there. I believe it had a lot of advantages of tourism's for the community and the
country
.
Furthermore
Add a comma
Furthermore,
show examples
 in my view having
occasional
Add an article
an occasional
show examples
event
Fix the agreement mistake
events
show examples
for encouraging
Change preposition
to encourage
show examples
 tourist
attraction
Add a comma
attraction,
show examples
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
will
facilitie
Correct your spelling
facilitate
 and probably give more information about the
country
Change noun form
country's
show examples
 heritage and cultural norms.
Submitted by Selfigih7 on

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task response
Focus on fully developing your main idea. Each supporting point should be elaborated on with specific details or examples.
task response
Avoid contractions (e.g., "it's") in formal writing. Use full forms like "it is".
coherence cohesion
Ensure the essay has a clear conclusion to summarize your stance and main points.
coherence cohesion
Improve transitions between ideas to make your argument flow better. Use phrases like "Furthermore," "In addition," and "On the other hand,".
coherence cohesion
Check for grammatical errors and ensure correct subject-verb agreement, e.g., "tourism can develop" not "tourism's can develop".
task response
You present a clear stance on the topic by stating your disagreement with the idea that tourism has many negative effects.
task response
Your essay provides relevant examples from your personal experience, which strengthens your argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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