The internet dramatically altered our lives over the past few decades. Although some of these changes have been negative , the overall effect of this technology has been positive. what asr your opinions on this?

The
internet
has significantly changed our lives recently. some of these changes are negative ,
while
on the whole almost most of these changes are positive.
it is clear that
,
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apply
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the
internet
has negative points in society ,
such
as addiction to the
internet
which leads to health
problems
, eye
problems
and physical
problems
. because many
people
sit still for hours and look at the phone.
furthermore
, all of the things that there are
in
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on
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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social media are not correct and in terms of mental , it can
be
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cauuse
Correct your spelling
cause
caused
fear among
people
especially children
as well as
old
people
.
Although
the
internet
has positive and negative effects on our lives , the positive impacts are more than
Correct article usage
the nagative
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nagative
Correct your spelling
negative
impacts.
furthure
Correct your spelling
further
future
, we can decide how to use from that ourselves.
Hence
, we can control
Correct pronoun usage
it in
show examples
in
Change preposition
on
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a positive path. since the
internet
creates
for
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apply
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improvement
due to
better lives.
As a
result
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result,
show examples
governments should increase that
according to
essential needs. on the ground that most advertisements depend on the
internet
and it must not disrupt. in my opinion ,
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
and social media are important for communication and technology. it can develop our communication attitude obviously. as we can communicate with all of
people
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the people
show examples
in every point of
world
Add an article
the world
show examples
. but I can not ignore the negative effects on daily routines because we spend most of
the
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our
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time on the
internet
that it
Correct pronoun usage
which
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causes
problems
specially
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especially
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for kids. To be honest , it is the parent's duty that control
this
situation. in conclusion , like everything the
internet
has positive and negative points. but it depends on us that use the
internet
for our improvement to having a better society .
Submitted by rastaebrahimifar on

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clear comprehensive ideas
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complete response
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relevant specific examples
Use specific examples to better support your points. For instance, mention particular studies, statistics, or real-life examples that illustrate the negative and positive effects of the internet.
introduction conclusion present
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion which frame your argument well.
supported main points
You correctly identify both negative and positive aspects of the internet, providing a balanced view on the topic.
logical structure
Your use of transitions like 'furthermore' and 'although' helps connect ideas within paragraphs, which is a good practice for coherence.

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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
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    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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