In many countries, fast food is becoming cheaper ans more widely available. Do the disadvantages of this outweigh the advantages?
There are widely differing views on the issue of whether fast demerits
food
is Use synonyms
dramatic increase
in the major countries around the world or not.l totally agree thatReplace the word
dramatically increasing
Correct article usage
the
are
outweigh Unnecessary verb
apply
by
the merits. There are two principal reasons for Change preposition
apply
this
.
One point which I believe to be absolutely Linking Words
privotal
is the fact that fast Correct your spelling
pivotal
food
is harmful Use synonyms
for
Change the preposition
to
people
's Use synonyms
digest
system.It is Replace the word
digestive
irrefutable
fact that individuals are consuming more fast Correct article usage
an irrefutable
food
as their main meal.Take Use synonyms
an
example of Russia ,where approximately 87% of Correct article usage
the
population
tends to eat junk Correct article usage
the population
food
Use synonyms
such
as KFC Linking Words
a
supposes it is prepared instant and much cheaper than wholesome Correct pronoun usage
which
food
.The majority of governments constantly produce fast Use synonyms
food
and commodities are exported to other countries by admistrations.An excellent example is Canadian inhabitants,who always have a problem of obesity and they may not even avoid Use synonyms
this
trouble by Linking Words
even
eating. Rephrase
apply
Nevertheless
,it is an undeniable fact that consuming fast Linking Words
food
to excess results in serious health Use synonyms
problem
.Fix the agreement mistake
problems
Food
Use synonyms
such
as chips , burgers and fried Linking Words
chickens
which are incredibly high in fat and salt are responsible for Fix the agreement mistake
chicken
gut
Correct article usage
the gut
such
ill as Linking Words
blod
pressure and Correct your spelling
blood
digest
system .The Replace the word
digestive
McDonalds
Change noun form
Mcdonald's
Mcdonalds'
clown
is a good example of Capitalize word
Clown
this
kind of junk Linking Words
food
.
Use synonyms
On the other hand
,another key reason that illustrates how crucial it is to have a beneficial effect .Linking Words
People
who Use synonyms
they
utilize fast Correct pronoun usage
apply
food
as Use synonyms
main
meal .Some Correct pronoun usage
their main
people
suggest that it is their right to the advantage of eating fast Use synonyms
food
which can save Use synonyms
Use synonyms
people's
money and time.
Change noun form
people
To sum up
, it seems to me that the potential dangers of fast Linking Words
food
are more significant than the possible benefits.Use synonyms
Submitted by Shaxnoza on
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task achievement
Ensure that you clearly state your position in the introduction. Although you mentioned agreeing that demerits outweigh the merits, the statement was somewhat unclear. Clarifying this in the introduction would set a stronger foundation for your essay.
coherence cohesion
Enhance your use of linking words and phrases to improve the logical flow of your ideas. For example, using transitions such as 'Firstly,' 'Furthermore,' and 'Finally' can help guide the reader through your points.
coherence cohesion
Pay close attention to grammatical accuracy and sentence structure. For instance, correct phrases such as 'dramatic increase in the major countries' to 'dramatic increase in many major countries'. This will help in making your ideas more comprehensible.
task achievement
Provide specific examples and statistics with clear sources where possible. For instance, avoid vague phrases like 'approximately 87% of population' without a source or context. This will add credibility to your argument.
task achievement
You have made a clear effort to address both sides of the argument, acknowledging potential benefits of fast food despite your stance on its disadvantages.
task achievement
You provided relevant examples, such as mentioning Russia and Canada, to support your points. This demonstrates an understanding of the topic's global relevance.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.