Today more and more people want things instantly (eg: goods, srevices, news). Why is this "Is it positive or negative development?"
Nowadays, the majority of the population has a desire to get immediate gratification
as well as
its
results for everything. Some Correct pronoun usage
apply
people
claim that this
means is
has good results for our social development, but, Correct your spelling
it
the
others believe Correct article usage
apply
that is
negative and bad. Due to
various opinion
, Fix the agreement mistake
opinions
this
essay will explain all the causes concerning the event and present a proper summary.
On the one hand, an increasing number of folks are preferring
speedy actions and reactions, so many new technologies Wrong verb form
prefer
were
invented to assist Wrong verb form
have been
people
with their needs. As a result
, the time
that individuals have to wait for the services no longer exist
, Correct subject-verb agreement
exists
instead
they will complete other work for the rest of the day. Moreover
, automation is another groundbreaking innovation which has made peoples’ daily activities enjoyable and comfortable. For example
, washing machines, electronic cookware, refrigerator
, air-conditioning and the list is endless. Because of inventions, Fix the agreement mistake
refrigerators
the
Correct article usage
apply
peoples’
knowledge Change noun form
people’s
is
Verb problem
has
broaden
the horizon.
Turning to the other side of Wrong verb form
broadened
argument
, some pitfalls Add an article
the argument
an argument
that
can easily overwhelm the potential benefits of Correct pronoun usage
apply
this
trend. It can contribute to a lack of perseverance and patience among individuals. The practice of delay
gratification, where individuals invest Replace the word
delayed
time
and effort for long-term rewards, is crucial for personal growth, skill development and achieving ambitious goals. What is more, it effects
Correct your spelling
affects
very
badly on human beings when they depend on Correct pronoun usage
them very
the
Correct article usage
apply
technologies
too much. Fix the agreement mistake
technology
For instance
, according to
research at Cambridge university
, London Capitalize word
University
has
90 Unnecessary verb
apply
percent
of youngsters who are hospitalized struggle with serious ailments.
In summary, to make more money, Change the spelling
per cent
people
invest a lot of time
working, which leaves them no time
for other errands. They prefer getting things done faster,
so that they can focus on making more money. Remove the comma
apply
However
, it causes some problems such
as effects on humans’ health or lack some
necessary Change preposition
of some
skill
for Fix the agreement mistake
skills
people
who depend on invention too much.Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
coherence cohesion
Your essay is generally well-organized, but there are a few areas where you can improve coherence and cohesion. Try to ensure that each paragraph logically flows into the next and each sentence within the paragraphs also follows smoothly from the previous one.
task achievement
You have provided a complete response to the task, touching on both the positive and negative aspects of instant gratification. However, you could develop your ideas more comprehensively and provide more specific examples to strengthen your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Your essay provides a balanced view, discussing both the benefits and drawbacks of the trend towards instant gratification.
task achievement
You have adequately identified and discussed the main points related to the task question.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!