Some people think it is more important to spend money on roads and motoways than on public transport systems such as railways and trams. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

A debatable discussion point is whether some people argue that it is very essential to invest
money
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
roads
and motorways
than
Rephrase
rather than
show examples
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
public transportation systems instance railroads and
tram
Fix the agreement mistake
trams
show examples
car
Fix the agreement mistake
cars
show examples
.
This
essay disagrees with
this
viewpoint and will now set out
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
examples of the advantages of investing
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
public
transport
to support that reasoning.
Firstly
, public
transport
is a green system in their life. It helps to reduce carbon emissions which is not good for their
healthy
Replace the word
health
show examples
.
Besides
, it provides alternative sources of energy that are renewable
such
as solar power,
electrical
Correct word choice
and electrical
show examples
energy and do not pollute the air.
For example
, carbon dioxide is produced by vehicle exhaust fumes and by burning fossil fuels causing
polluted
Correct article usage
a polluted
show examples
environment. Another point to consider is that
invest
Wrong verb form
investing
show examples
money
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
roads
and motorways is one step forward to
modernize
Wrong verb form
modernising
show examples
the city.
Roads
and motorways will be expanded. It avoids
long distance
Add a hyphen
long-distance
show examples
travel. It will
also
be a smart choice because of
reduction
Correct article usage
the reduction
show examples
of traffic congestion.
For instance
, the reduction of traffic
tram
Fix the agreement mistake
trams
show examples
will help people go to work or go to school punctual to avoid
complaint
Fix the agreement mistake
complaints
show examples
from something else. In conclusion, public
transport
is
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
green system and provides lots of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
benefits in our
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
. It has
positive
Add an article
a positive
show examples
impact on
environment
Add an article
the environment
show examples
.
Thus
,
this
essay has shown that
spend
Wrong verb form
spending
show examples
money
on public
transport
is
important
Correct quantifier usage
more important
show examples
for our life rather than
spend
Wrong verb form
spending
show examples
money
on
roads
and railways.

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coherence cohesion
Your essay would benefit from a clearer logical structure. Each paragraph should start with a clear topic sentence, and the ideas within the paragraph should logically follow from one another.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction should clearly state what the essay will discuss. While you have indicated your disagreement, the phrasing is somewhat awkward. Consider rephrasing for clarity.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples to support your points. This will make your arguments more persuasive and show a deeper level of understanding of the topic.
task achievement
Make sure your points are fully developed. For instance, when discussing the environmental benefits of public transport, expand on how renewable energy sources contribute to reducing pollution.
task achievement
Your essay addresses both sides of the argument, showing an awareness of the complexity of the issue.
coherence cohesion
Your conclusion effectively summarizes your argument and restates your position.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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