IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

In some countries there has been an increase in the number of parents who are choosing to educate their children themselves at home instead of sending them to school.Do the advantages of home education outweigh the disadvantages?

#countries #parents #children #home #school #education
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The majority of parents choose to educate children at
house
Add an article
the house
show examples
 are
increasing
Verb problem
apply
show examples
than educate
at
Correct pronoun usage
them at
show examples
school
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
 author
do
Change the verb form
does
show examples
 not argue that the drawback of easy to distract and
do
Correct subject-verb agreement
does
show examples
 not have social skills. The most disadvantageous factor of studying at
home
Use synonyms
 is that
make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
show examples
 children
easy to
Replace the word
easily
show examples
distract
Wrong verb form
distracted
show examples
.
In other words
Linking Words
,when
learner
Fix the agreement mistake
learners
show examples
Use synonyms
study
Change the verb form
studies
show examples
 at
home
Use synonyms
,they can
easy
Change the word
easily
show examples
 to
distract
Wrong verb form
distracted
show examples
with
Change preposition
by
show examples
 social media,social
plattforms
Correct your spelling
platforms
 and so on.
Therefore
Linking Words
,hard to keep concentrate on
lesson
Add an article
the lesson
a lesson
show examples
 or hard to learn by heart.Take
in
Correct your spelling
an
show examples
 epidemic
Linking Words
for
Add the comma(s)
, for
show examples
 instance,learners have to
study
Use synonyms
 online because they can not go to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
school
Use synonyms
.I am the eyewitness that my friends post some pictures on the Internet
while
Linking Words
 the teacher is teaching. Another drawback of learning at
home
Use synonyms
 is do not have social skills.
This
Linking Words
 means they do not have opportunities to connect with people like their friends or do not know how to
do teamwork
Verb problem
work
show examples
.
For example
Linking Words
,learners who
study
Use synonyms
 at
home
Use synonyms
 when
come
Change the verb form
coming
show examples
 to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society,they do not know how to respond
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
difficult
Add an article
a difficult
show examples
situation
Fix the agreement mistake
situations
show examples
.
Moreover
Linking Words
,when they go to universities,they do not have much
experiences
Fix the agreement mistake
experience
show examples
to do
Verb problem
in
show examples
 teamwork
as well as
Linking Words
 how
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
 solving
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
show examples
 skills.
However
Linking Words
,
learn
Wrong verb form
learning
show examples
 at
home
Use synonyms
is have
Wrong verb form
has
show examples
 some
benefit
Fix the agreement mistake
benefits
show examples
 like
have
Change the verb form
having
show examples
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 comfortable
atmostphere
Correct your spelling
atmosphere
 and no pressure at the time.
This
Linking Words
 means it
do
Change the verb form
does
show examples
 not take too much time to go to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
school
Use synonyms
that is
Linking Words
do
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
not afraid to be late.
Consequently
Linking Words
,comfortable to
study
Use synonyms
.
For instance
Linking Words
,they always wake up at 6 AM to go to
school
Use synonyms
 and get dressed
while
Linking Words
Use synonyms
study
Wrong verb form
studying
show examples
 at
home
Use synonyms
 you just need to access
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
that
Correct determiner usage
apply
show examples
softwares
Correct your spelling
software
 like Zoom or Google
meet
Capitalize word
Meet
show examples
 to enter
at
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the class.
To sum up
Linking Words
,
have
Wrong verb form
having
show examples
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 comfortable
atmostphere
Correct your spelling
atmosphere
 is outweighed than easy to distract and
do
Verb problem
apply
show examples
not
have
Wrong verb form
having
show examples
 social
skill
Fix the agreement mistake
skills
show examples
.
Hence
Linking Words
,have a big impact on the process of the student when
do
Change the verb form
doing
show examples
 an exam.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Grammar
Ensure proper grammar usage and sentence structure to improve clarity and readability.
Coherence and Cohesion
Develop more cohesive paragraphs by using appropriate linking words and phrases to connect ideas smoothly.
Task Achievement
Provide more detailed and specific examples to support your main points effectively.
Task Achievement
The essay addresses both advantages and disadvantages of home education, showing a balanced perspective.
Task Achievement
Clear effort to provide specific examples to support arguments.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: