Rich countries should not employ skilled labour from poor countries, as poor countries need the workers more. To what extent do you agree with this statement?

Whether qualified

workers

need to work in developed

countries

or undeveloped areas require high quantities of human resources is a difficult issue worldwide. The author agrees because The financial status in wealthy

countries

is really competitive and hard nowadays, and the poor ones should focus on training their employees rather than employing more. More workforce is

due to

hardly finding jobs in modern

countries

because of difficult competitive conditions.

In other words

, if poor labour-skilled employees engage in hustle

countries

Correct subject-verb agreement

are

show examples

due to

reduce the number of job positions.

Furthermore

, wealthy states should limit the number of out-of-state

workers

to help citizens get less pressure when looking forward to doing their dream jobs. So

that

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

fewer immigrant

workers

means more job opportunities for local people. Another reason why developing nations should concentrate on their

workers

that

Add a missing verb

is that

show examples

other

countries

to hire

workers

While

having a large number of skilled labourers and expert

workers

they can do quite well without alluring skilled professionals to come and work there. For that reason, developing one’s social

workers

makes way for a more educated workforce.

For example

, Korea always focus on improving the quality of labour to serve the country's economic needs In conclusion, a better lifestyle and more money are the reasons skilled labourers migrate to rich

countries

and

this

brain drain system should be stopped for the

overall

betterment of the world. From that action, rich

countries

can reduce the payment burden on outsiders and poor ones can use their talented

workers

to improve their socio-economic background.

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task achievement

Try to provide more specific and concrete examples to support your main points. This will make your argument stronger and more convincing.

coherence cohesion

Work on enhancing the logical flow between your paragraphs. This will help your essay to be more cohesive and easier to follow.

task achievement

You addressed the prompt well and provided relevant arguments.

coherence cohesion

Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps frame your points effectively.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

254 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5

5.5

Logical structure

6.5

Introduction & conclusion present

5.5

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

5.5

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Your opinion

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