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Band 7.5

Many young people today change their jobs or careers every few years. Do you think this has more advantages than disadvantages?

#people #change #jobs #careers #years
In
this
 day and age, a plethora of young generations have the tendency to change their occupations frequently.
This
 essay attempts to shed light on both the merits and demerits of
this
 trend before concluding that the advantages are weightier than their disadvantages. On the one hand, changing
jobs
 every year could be disadvantageous to a certain extent.
Firstly
, youngsters could face financial burdens.
This
 is because switching
jobs
 in a short-term period means they do not have a stable income
as well as
 a stable financial situation, thereby leading them to deal with many living costs
such
 as tax hikes, housing rent, and transportation expenses.
Secondly
, sometimes it could make young
people
 become inconsistent
people
. To be more specific, if young employees just quickly change their
jobs
 because they cannot adapt to
this
 environment or even do not put up with their managers and their colleagues, they could become impolite
as well as
 untruthful candidates, which could bring
Add an article
a
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myriad of challenges for them when they want to seek a new job.
On the other hand
, there are a host of compelling reasons as to why I am convinced that changing occupations every few years could offer numerous benefits for young
people
. One key rationale in favour of
this
 view is that it could enrich their life experience.
This
 perspective could be reinforced by the fact that those who switch
jobs
 frequently could have vast opportunities to experience a new work environment, sometimes it could give them a chance to meet top-notch professors in those fields, and after that, they could enhance their abilities, nurture their talents, and foster their creativity. Another justification is that youngsters could be more professional.
This
 is because, being exposed to many corporations and interacting with different types of humans, could help young writers know how to convey information and their ideas in an effective way. Consequentially, young
people
 could not only be more confident and build up an attractive CV with tons of experience in
this
 major, but they could
also
 have a great chance of landing a well-earned job because these large businesses nowadays tend to find experienced workers. In conclusion,
while
 it is irrefutable that doing different
jobs
 over many years could have some downsides, I would contend that the upsides it offers are more significantly noteworthy.
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clear comprehensive ideas
To improve, ensure your ideas are consistently clear and comprehensive. Sometimes, sentences were a bit too long and could be split for clarity.
supported main points
Make sure your arguments are consistently focused and expand your points with more precise examples. This can help in providing a deeper understanding of each idea presented.
complete response
The essay presents a complete response to the prompt, addressing both advantages and disadvantages of changing jobs frequently.
logical structure
The essay follows a clear and logical structure with a well-defined introduction and conclusion.
relevant specific examples
The supporting points are relevant and well-supported with specific examples, making the arguments convincing.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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