Some people believe that managers are responsible for the organization’s success, while others think various features of the organization play a vital role in it. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #managers #organization’s #success #features #organization #role

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Nowadays, there is debate regarding the

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company

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’s success.

While

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some attribute that leadership is the key role,

however

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, others believe workers play a crucial role in archiving a well-known reputation. The founder of the

company

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invented a new idea and started their business through struggle and hard work. Founder play key roles in the direction of and support of the

company

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. The

company

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inventer

also

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fosters the

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company

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’s economic growth by sharing their own

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company

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’s products.

As a result

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, there will increase in the wages of all employees.

Moreover

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, the

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company

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’s head can

also

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attract customers by effectively exploring their ideas and advantages of the product from the media like TV and billboards.

On the other hand

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, CEOs, CFOs and employees

also

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play a crucial role in making a

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company

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’s name removed.

For example

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, every team’s boss knows the weaknesses and strengths point of their team’s members so, the team boss can easily provide work to their staff. The boss can

also

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set time limits to complete tasks efficiently.

However

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this

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all together creates exhilarating ideas and presents them in front of their leader to take their opinion.

Moreover

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, Advertisers can

creat

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create

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innovative ideas to catch the public attention.

For instance

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, the Dettol soup advertises caught many people’s attention by creating it in a new way.

Consequently

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, the number of buyers of the product increases and causes a redundant amount of profits to the

company

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. In the recapitulation, I tend to deem that, initial sparks came from the

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company

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’s leader,

However

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, for achieving International

recognization

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recognition

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the

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company

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’s head and workers are essential.

Submitted by milonishekhaliya on Sat Jun 01 2024

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Coherence and Cohesion

Your essay could benefit from better logical structure. Try to organize your paragraphs so that each one introduces a clear point related to the topic question and supports this point with relevant details and examples.

Task Achievement

You have provided a complete response to the prompt and included both sides of the argument. However, your points could be more comprehensively explained. Consider developing your ideas further with more detailed explanations and specific examples.

Task Achievement

There are a few grammatical errors and awkward phrases that can interfere with the clarity of your ideas. For example, consider using 'achieving' instead of 'archiving', and 'Dettol soap advertisement' instead of 'Dettol soup advertises'. This will help to make your essay more clear and professional.

Coherence and Cohesion

You have included an introduction and a conclusion, which helps to structure your essay well.

Task Achievement

You have given relevant specific examples, such as the Dettol advertisement, which strengthens your points.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

262 words

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Some people believe that managers are responsible for the organization’s success, while others think various features of the organization play a vital role in it. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Include an introduction and conclusion

Students at schools and universities learn far more by lessons with their teachers compared to other sources (e.g. television, the Internet). Do you agree or disagree?

All children should study a foreign language in school, starting in the earliest grades. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Many museums and historical sites are mainly visited by tourists but not local people. Why is this the case and what can be done to attract more local people to visit these places?

Many governments think that economic progress is their most important goal. Some people, however, think that other types of progress are equally important for a country. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

The cities and towns all over the world the high volume of traffic is problem what are the causes of this and what actions can be taken to solve this problem.