A lot of money is spent nowadays searching for oil. As the world's oil resources will eventually run out, it would be more logical to spend some of this money on developing new sources of power, such as wind and solar. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

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In the contemporary world, a significant amount of resources are directed toward
oil
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and
gas
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exploration operations. Bearing in mind the fact that fossil fuels are finite in the environment, investing in infinite
energy
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sources like
wind
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and solar power would be a more feasible investment choice. It is my contention that not only
oil
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and
gas
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energy
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is detrimental to the environment, but
also
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they are finite in the earth's crust,
therefore
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, I believe shifting towards renewable
energy
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sources will bring in numerous additional benefits to us. First up, scientists have predicted that the earth has solely 40 years enough of fossil fuels to await to be extracted,
therefore
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, the importance of switching towards alternative
energy
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providers is unquestionably critical for humanity to evolve into its next shape. Luckily, the earth has ample amounts of
energy
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resources that are infinite and eco-friendly at the same time. Many countries including the heavy
oil
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and
gas
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suppliers
instead
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of financing new
oil
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and
gas
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investigation operations are heavily investing in the development of solar-powered
energy
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plants and
wind
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turbines as they offer a promising and impactful future to them.
For example
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, almost all of the OPEC countries are now in a race to become a world leader in renewable
energy
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production led by the China and US.
Therefore
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, I believe renewable
energy
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is the panacea to combat global warming and cut off the CO2 emissions which are emitted by fossil fuel users.
Moreover
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,
besides
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the renowned advantages, the cost of green
energy
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is almost as competitive as
oil
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energy
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. As more investor interest shifts towards eco-friendly
energy
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, the price to harness solar,
wind
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or hydropower is getting lower every day,
thus
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, bridging the gap between traditional and modern
energy
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sources. Given all these advantages, investors appear to be highly receptive to green investment pitches, making it easier than ever to attract potential customers for
such
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investments. One of the most powerful sides of renewable
energy
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is that it will remedy the damage caused by
oil
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energy
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and
this
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alone is enough to prioritize renewable
energy
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. In conclusion,
although
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initially
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, many individuals were sceptical of the idea of sun and
wind
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power superseding
oil
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and
gas
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energy
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, the reality elucidates a completely opposite scenario as the potential of green resources is unparalleled in comparison to any other alternatives.
Submitted by orkhanshamil on

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task achievement
Consider adding more specific examples and data to strengthen your arguments. This can help to make your points more convincing and show a deeper understanding of the topic.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that all paragraphs transition smoothly from one idea to the next. While your essay is logically structured, sometimes the connection between sentences or ideas can be strengthened for better flow.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear structure with a strong introduction and conclusion that restate and support your main argument.
task achievement
You adequately covered the topic by exploring both the environmental impact and the finiteness of fossil fuels, along with the advantages of renewable energy.
coherence cohesion
Your language use is generally clear, and you present your ideas comprehensively.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • finite
  • renewable energy sources
  • expenditure
  • compromise
  • sustainable
  • environmental impact
  • infrastructure
  • economic sustainability
  • dependency
  • fluctuating prices
  • stimulate
  • job creation
  • vested interests
  • transition
  • reluctance
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