Increasing the price of petrol is the best way to solve growing traffic and pollution problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree? What other measures do you think might be effective?

Some
people
say that a high price for petrol can prevent growing traffic and ecological problems. In
this
essay
Add a comma
essay,
show examples
I will discuss
about
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
other measures which can solve
this
problem and why I disagree with
first
Change the article
the first
show examples
statement.
Overall
, increasing the price of petrol cannot
to
Change the verb form
apply
show examples
solve the problem of crowded traffic because it can
be
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
lead to
Add an article
an economical
show examples
economical
Replace the word
economic
show examples
burden for school buses, emergency cars and other social urgent departments. It can bring a
lot
of problems with
salary
Correct article usage
the salary
show examples
of the workers who
affiliated
Add a missing verb
are affiliated
show examples
with public transport. I am not good at Ecology Sciences, but in my opinion,
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
should improve the
apply
Replace the word
application
show examples
of the filters which clean the air from pollution. We cannot afford ourselves stay without
car
Add an article
a car
show examples
.
Car
is necessary seen in every family.
Government
efforts should direct it to
providing
Change the verb form
provide
show examples
a necessary quantity of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
filters which can absorb dangerous emissions, which produced
car
Fix the agreement mistake
cars
show examples
.
Also
,
government
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the government
show examples
should plant a
lot
of trees. All we
known
Wrong verb form
know
show examples
from school,
Add a missing verb
is the
show examples
the
Correct your spelling
that
show examples
trees produce a
lot
of oxygen.
However
, not only
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
must be responsible for
ecological
Add an article
the ecological
show examples
problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
show examples
.
People
also
can do preventive activities to protect
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
nature.
For example
,
people
can walk to the near distances in order to drive a
car
. Sometimes
people
can ride a vehicle. For
this
government
can build a network of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
vehicle
Fix the agreement mistake
vehicles
show examples
within the city.
To conclude
for improving
Change preposition
to improve
show examples
our ecological conditions, we should plant a
lot
of trees
use
Wrong verb form
using
show examples
a vehicle,
use
Correct word choice
and use
show examples
a cleaning filters
Correct the article-noun agreement
cleaning filters
a cleaning filter
show examples
. Increasing the price of petrol
dont
Correct your spelling
don't
resolve the pollution and growing traffic.
Submitted by nook.cooks.hook.uz on

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coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are present, but they need to be more comprehensive and clearer. Ensure your introduction clearly outlines your stance and your key arguments. The conclusion should summarize the main points discussed and restate your stance effectively.
coherence cohesion
Try to articulate your main points more clearly, ensuring that each paragraph discusses a single main idea with supporting evidence. Logical links between ideas should be enhanced to improve the overall flow of the essay.
task achievement
Your arguments need further development and support. While you briefly mention alternatives like filters and tree planting, providing specific examples and evidence would strengthen your essay significantly.
task achievement
Although you address the topic and present different points, your ideas need to be more comprehensively explained. Aim to expand on each point to provide a deeper analysis.
task achievement
Including specific examples or data can make your arguments more convincing. For instance, discussing successful implementations of alternative measures in other cities or countries may add depth to your essay.
task achievement
Your essay attempts to provide a balanced view by discussing both the given prompt and alternative measures. This is a good approach to take.
task achievement
You present multiple strategies for addressing traffic and pollution, showcasing your ability to think of alternative solutions.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which frames your argument effectively.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Discourage
  • Incentivize
  • Alternative energy
  • Public transportation
  • Lower-income
  • Carpool
  • Ride-sharing
  • Congestion
  • Urban planning
  • Pedestrian-friendly
  • Tax incentives
  • Electric and hybrid vehicles
  • Emissions standards
  • Cleaner vehicles
  • Congestion charges
  • Bicycle lanes
  • Sustainable
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