Increasing the price of petrol is the best way to solve growing traffic and pollution problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree? What other measures do you think might be effective?
Some
people
say that a high price for petrol can prevent growing traffic and ecological problems. In this
essay
I will discuss Add a comma
essay,
about
other measures which can solve Remove the preposition
apply
this
problem and why I disagree with first
statement.
Change the article
the first
Overall
, increasing the price of petrol cannot to
solve the problem of crowded traffic because it can Change the verb form
apply
be
lead to Unnecessary verb
apply
Add an article
an economical
economical
burden for school buses, emergency cars and other social urgent departments. It can bring a Replace the word
economic
lot
of problems with salary
of the workers who Correct article usage
the salary
affiliated
with public transport. I am not good at Ecology Sciences, but in my opinion, Add a missing verb
are affiliated
government
should improve the Add an article
the government
apply
of the filters which clean the air from pollution. We cannot afford ourselves stay without Replace the word
application
car
. Add an article
a car
Car
is necessary seen in every family. Government
efforts should direct it to providing
a necessary quantity of Change the verb form
provide
the
filters which can absorb dangerous emissions, which produced Correct article usage
apply
car
. Fix the agreement mistake
cars
Also
, government
should plant a Add an article
the government
lot
of trees. All we known
from school, Wrong verb form
know
Add a missing verb
is the
the
trees produce a Correct your spelling
that
lot
of oxygen. However
, not only government
must be responsible for Add an article
the government
ecological
Add an article
the ecological
problem
. Fix the agreement mistake
problems
People
also
can do preventive activities to protect the
nature. Correct article usage
apply
For example
, people
can walk to the near distances in order to drive a car
. Sometimes people
can ride a vehicle. For this
government
can build a network of the
Correct article usage
apply
vehicle
within the city.
Fix the agreement mistake
vehicles
To conclude
for improving
our ecological conditions, we should plant a Change preposition
to improve
lot
of trees use
a vehicle, Wrong verb form
using
use
Correct word choice
and use
a cleaning filters
. Increasing the price of petrol Correct the article-noun agreement
cleaning filters
a cleaning filter
dont
resolve the pollution and growing traffic.Correct your spelling
don't
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coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are present, but they need to be more comprehensive and clearer. Ensure your introduction clearly outlines your stance and your key arguments. The conclusion should summarize the main points discussed and restate your stance effectively.
coherence cohesion
Try to articulate your main points more clearly, ensuring that each paragraph discusses a single main idea with supporting evidence. Logical links between ideas should be enhanced to improve the overall flow of the essay.
task achievement
Your arguments need further development and support. While you briefly mention alternatives like filters and tree planting, providing specific examples and evidence would strengthen your essay significantly.
task achievement
Although you address the topic and present different points, your ideas need to be more comprehensively explained. Aim to expand on each point to provide a deeper analysis.
task achievement
Including specific examples or data can make your arguments more convincing. For instance, discussing successful implementations of alternative measures in other cities or countries may add depth to your essay.
task achievement
Your essay attempts to provide a balanced view by discussing both the given prompt and alternative measures. This is a good approach to take.
task achievement
You present multiple strategies for addressing traffic and pollution, showcasing your ability to think of alternative solutions.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which frames your argument effectively.
Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.
‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.
Examples:
I really want to study but I’m too tired.
I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.
If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.