Some people think that Olympics Games are exciting events that bring other nations together. Others say Olympics is a waste of money could be better spent on other things. Discuss both views and give your own opinions.
It is a common belief that
Correct article usage
the Olympics
Olympics
Fix the agreement mistake
Olympic
Games
is
a waste of money and they feel better when Correct subject-verb agreement
are
spent
money on other things will have more Wrong verb form
spending
benefit
. Fix the agreement mistake
benefits
This
essay agrees with opinion
that Add an article
the opinion
Correct article usage
the Olympics
Olympics
Fix the agreement mistake
Olympic
Games
will bring other countries
together rather than the ideas of some residents feel
Correct pronoun usage
who feel
waste
of money to do things related to the Correct article usage
a waste
competition
.
Nowadays, the Olympics
Fix the agreement mistake
Olympic
Games
had
a big common around the world and Wrong verb form
have
who
winning it will bring Correct pronoun usage
apply
respects
other Fix the agreement mistake
respect
countries
to their
Change the word
other
countries
. That
Correct determiner usage
Games
games
of
many Change preposition
in
countries
organize
for Wrong verb form
are organised
talent
Replace the word
talented
people
, so not only exciting events,
but Remove the comma
apply
also
is the competition
very difficult for people
who take part in it. If people
in country
win Add an article
the country
Correct article usage
the Olympics
Olympics
Correct your spelling
Olympic
games
, they will bring many respects
, Fix the agreement mistake
much respect
Correct word choice
and admire
admire
Replace the word
admiration
of
themselves to Change preposition
for
proud
Replace the word
pride
of
Change preposition
in
nations
together. Yet Correct article usage
the nations
people
who enjoy it will spend a lot of time themselves for
training every day until begin Change preposition
apply
Olympics
games
. When they win the competition
, other people
in the world will admire them and also
help their country develop about
international relationships.
Change preposition
apply
In contrast
, the opponents of my idea typically state that this
event cover
an extreme number of finance for Change the verb form
covers
constructing
Replace the word
construction
such
as football stadiums, badminton courts, swimming pools, etc. As a result
, this
event had enormous one-off projects used in the Olympics
Fix the agreement mistake
Olympic
Games
. Therefore
, causing a detrimental case of long-term debt, although
they know it had
Wrong verb form
has
Correct article usage
a purposed
purposed
Replace the word
purpose
toward
Change preposition
for
social
. Replace the word
society
Instead
of
Change preposition
apply
its
, some Correct pronoun usage
apply
people
want the government to invest for
building projects and Change preposition
in
improve
Wrong verb form
improving
lives
of residents.
Correct article usage
the lives
Furthermore
, the Olympics
Fix the agreement mistake
Olympic
Games
also
help progress and bring many opportunities for diplomatic relations of participating countries
. That’s because, this
competition
is a prize which is for all people
from other countries
, so it will set up relations of all countries
.
In conclusion, this
competition
can help bring many benefits for country
about respectability and many diplomatic relations Add an article
the country
a country
from
other Change preposition
with
countries
. Thus
, it is crucial to observe the massive opposition from the residents, which
in order to prevent unpredictable conflicts.Correct pronoun usage
apply
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coherence cohesion
Work on ensuring your ideas are clearly organized, and ensure each paragraph has a clear main idea and logical progression. Use topic sentences for better coherence and cohesion.
coherence cohesion
Make sure your introduction clearly outlines the points you will discuss, and your conclusion effectively summarizes your main points.
task achievement
Provide more relevant and specific examples to strengthen your arguments. Make sure each point is supported by clear, relevant evidence or examples.
task achievement
Clarify and develop your ideas comprehensively. Some ideas in the current essay are too general or vague, lacking depth.
task achievement
You have addressed both views in the essay, which shows a good understanding of the prompt.
coherence cohesion
The conclusion and introduction are present, summarizing the main points discussed in the essay.
coherence cohesion
The essay attempts to link sentences and ideas together, showing a basic understanding of coherence and cohesion principles.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.