IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

some people think that we should invent a new language for international communication . Will th e benefits of this outweigh the problems associated with it?

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These days a new language is drawing a lot of attention from the public . In some cases , the majority of
people
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 believe that a new language for folk all over the world should be created . I really trust that the advantages overshadow the disadvantages and the reasons will be explained now .
To begin
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 with , the most advantageous factor of new inventions is that they can bridge the gap between nations . If it does not have a communication barrier , some international problems will be easier to deal with
such
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 as the environment ,economic wars ,...
As a result
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 , the development can reduce negative
affects
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effects
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 for every country even small nations. Another point to consider is that students who want to go abroad to study , will not waste time ,money ,... to learn new languages.
Furthermore
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 ,
the
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apply
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overpopulation can be solved
due to
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 flexible movement.
For instance
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 , society from some crowded nations
as
Correct quantifier usage
such as
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 China , India ,... can go to others which have few residents to live or study. The main drawbacks associated with the ability of community.
For example
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 , some
people
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 like elders who are too old to learn a new language .
Moreover
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homeless
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, homeless
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people
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 ,
orphans
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and orphans
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 don't have enough money to go to study .
As a result
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, they cannot catch up with other
people
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. In conclusion ,after carefully considering many aspects of the given issue in the topic
is that
Verb problem
,
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 we should invent a new wording for global communication .I still believe that the benefits are more significant than the drawbacks

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task achievement
Ensure you clarify the advantages and disadvantages more distinctly, and provide balanced arguments to strengthen your task response. Make sure to elaborate on each point clearly. Examples provided were somewhat relevant but could be more specific and detailed.
coherence cohesion
Improve the logical structure of your essay by organizing it into clear paragraphs with a single main idea in each. This will enhance the coherence and cohesion of your writing. Additionally, the use of linking words and phrases can be smoother and more varied.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that both the introduction and conclusion are well-defined. The introduction should set the stage clearly, and the conclusion should provide a comprehensive summary of the key points discussed in the essay.
coherence cohesion
The essay is structured with a clear introduction, supporting sections, and a conclusion. The points made are all relevant to the topic and contribute to the argument.
task achievement
The key ideas, such as bridging the communication gap and reducing overpopulation, show a comprehensive understanding of the potential impacts of creating a new international language.

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – Problems
  • Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • One of the first problems of the...
  • Another problem that needs to be considered...
  • A possible solution to this problem would be...
  • One immediate practical solution is to...

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