IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 3

Some pp prefer to spend their lives doing the same things and avoiding change. Others, however, that change is aways a good thing. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#pp #lives #change #aways
Nowadays,
people
 have
tendency
Add an article
a tendency
show examples
go
Fix the infinitive
to go
show examples
 deep insight
our
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
mind
Fix the agreement mistake
minds
show examples
. So
that
Correct determiner usage
apply
show examples
, the deep spirit aspect
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
 been dug more over justifiably. A group of
people
suppose
Wrong verb form
is supposed
show examples
 to do the same things and avoid
change
.
However
, their opponent
think
Change the verb form
thinks
show examples
 that
change
 is better. And
this
 essay I will show you my opinion
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 both these
view
Change the determiner
views
show examples
.
Firstly
,
let
Add a missing verb
let's
show examples
 talk about why some
people
 point out that
change
 is always a good thing. Personally,
change
 is necessarily related to
development
Add an article
the development
show examples
 of
human
Fix the agreement mistake
humans
show examples
, it
also
Add a missing verb
is also
show examples
 related to
growth
Add an article
the growth
show examples
 of all
animal
Fix the agreement mistake
animals
show examples
.
Change
 is
normalize
Wrong verb form
normalised
show examples
.
In genetically
Correct word choice
Genetically
show examples
 speaking, we have
natural
Add an article
a natural
show examples
 selection which
the
Add a missing verb
is the
show examples
 process of selectively reproducing the phenotype or genetic
consituation
Correct your spelling
constitution
 to adapt to
survival
Correct article usage
a survival
show examples
 environment. For
instant
Replace the word
instance
show examples
, the leaf of
plant
Add an article
a plant
the plant
show examples
 in
dessert
Correct article usage
the dessert
show examples
 is evolute from
think
Correct article usage
a think
show examples
 and wide shape for
easer
Correct your spelling
ease
show examples
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
 drainage to
small
Correct article usage
a small
show examples
 cylinder shape
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 limit
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
dehydration. Example for more
familier
Correct your spelling
familiar
families
 to our
live
Replace the word
lives
show examples
, a person
growns
Correct your spelling
grows
 up through each
steps
Change to a singular noun
step
show examples
 of childhood and adolescence and becomes more mature and intelligent. Nothing
come
Change the verb form
comes
show examples
 to us without the disadvantage, so we should not be pursued in all situations. On the other aspect,
Change
come
Change the verb form
comes
show examples
 with many
variable
Change to a plural noun
variables
show examples
 and
make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
show examples
 some
people
feeling
Wrong verb form
feel
show examples
 tired because they must
to
Change the verb form
apply
show examples
handle all of
Add an article
the change
show examples
change
Fix the agreement mistake
changes
show examples
. Sometimes,
change
make
Change the verb form
makes
show examples
accident
Correct article usage
an accident
show examples
instead
 of
chance
Correct article usage
a chance
show examples
. But safety is one of the most basic human pursuits.
Submitted by jakelong16091994 on

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introduction conclusion
Try to properly introduce the topic and focus on the main idea more clearly in the introduction. A clearer thesis statement will help guide your essay.
logical structure
Ensure each paragraph contains one clear idea and has a logical progression. Using connectors and transitions will help.
supported main points
Develop your arguments more fully and provide specific examples to support your points. This will help your essay be more convincing.
clear comprehensive ideas
To improve clarity, use more precise vocabulary and ensure that grammatical structures are accurate.
relevant specific examples
You've made a good attempt at discussing both sides of the argument.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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