Some people argue that fashion items cost too much money. Others say that this is acceptable because fashion is an important part of life. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion

#people #fashion #items #cost #money #part #life

Nowdays

Correct the word

Nowadays

show examples

, some

people

belive

Correct your spelling

believe

show examples

that

fashion

accessories are very expensive. other

people

claim that

this

is acceptable because

fashion

is a very necessary part of life. in my point of view,

Change the capitalization

show examples

think I agree with both opinions.

Initially

Clothes

made

from

Change preposition

show examples

famous

fashion

brands

will be more expensive than other

clothes

. Many famous

clothes

brands

always want to create

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

unique and different from the popular

clothes

so they will choose special patterns to design

Correct the article-noun agreement

apply

show examples

complete

clothes

so the

price

increases

Change the verb form

are

show examples

normal.

for instance

luis vuitton

Correct your spelling

Louis Vuitton

uses

special

Add an article

a special

show examples

logo to print on

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

shirt

Fix the agreement mistake

shirts

show examples

to make the

clothes

eye -catching

Correct your spelling

eye-catching

show examples

, which helps the company increase the

price

of the item because it attracts many buyers.

in addition

, Material is

also

the cause of

clothes

price

Fix the agreement mistake

prices

show examples

Wrong verb form

going

show examples

up.

People

want

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

shirt

Fix the agreement mistake

shirts

show examples

not only beautiful but

also

durable so

fashion

brands

must meet their needs by using quality materials.

for

Capitalize word

For

show examples

example, the

brands

Fix the agreement mistake

brand

show examples

lacoste

Change the capitalization

Lacoste

show examples

uses crocodile skin to make

very

Add an article

a very

the very

show examples

beautiful wallet.

However

, Some

people

feel dissatisfied because the

price

of big

brands

is too expensive. They wish to be able to own some

clothes

they find beautiful but the

price

of that outfit prevented them from buying it and they thought that the clothing company should drop to the

price

more appropriate.

Overall

, an expensive outfit depends on the material and the difference compared to other clothing

brands

. But some

clothes

are still virtual prices compared to

its

Correct pronoun usage

their

show examples

real

price

Fix the agreement mistake

prices

show examples

, so I agree with two view

Submitted by duongntt.tld on Mon Jun 03 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement

Your essay would be enhanced by providing more balanced coverage of both views. Delving a bit deeper into the second argument will create a more comprehensive discussion.

coherence cohesion

There are a few grammatical and punctuation errors that affect the readability of your essay. Paying attention to these details will improve your writing.

coherence cohesion

To achieve a clearer structure, ensure each main idea is discussed in its own paragraph and is fully developed with supporting details.

task achievement

You have provided some relevant examples to support your arguments, which strengthens your essay.

task achievement

Your essay shows a clear effort to present both sides of the argument, which is commendable.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
22Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

250 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7.5
band
What skills are taught in school in comparison to what is needed in actual life
The school curriculum in the UK is designed by the Department of Education. They decide what subjects and skills the students need to learn in school and high school. When we talk about skills, we can distinguish between skills for our future jobs or skills required to run our household effectively. In this essay, I will discuss what is the current situation in the UK with respect to these two different skill sets in schools.
6
band
You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write about the following topic: Some people argue that all experimentation on animals is bad and should be outlawed. However, others believe that important scientific discoveries can be made from animal experiments. Can experimentation on animals be justified? Are there any alternatives? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience. Write at least 250 words.
Many pieces of research done by scientists are focused on animals. According to them, experimentation with these species is more practical because their bodies are quite similar to humans. while some people believe that it is not fair to use animals for research purposes, others are in favor of applying tests on them. In my opinion, animals must not be tortured to realize experimentation because they deserve to live and feel the same pain as humans.
6
band
Some people think that global environmental problems should be dealt with globally. Others think that they should be solved locally. What is your opinion
Although some are of the opinion that environmental conundrums should be tackled on an international level, others claim that they can be solved domestically. In my opinion, I believe that these problems have to be dealt with internationally because the effects are amazing.
8
band
In the future all cars, buses and trucks will be driverless. The only people travelling inside these vehicles will be passengers. Do you think the advantages of driverless vehicles outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant example for your own knowledge or experience.
By progressing technology, the prevalence of self-driving cars is not out of expectation in the near future. While some would argue that these smart vehicles are not reliable at all, l believe that they would both facilitate life for humans and provide people with a safer life. Two of the principal reasons for this are as follows.
7
band
More developing countries are given aid from international organziations to help them in their development plans. Some people argue that financial aid is important but others suggest that practical aid and advice are more important. Discuss both views and give your opinion
It is undeniable that many developing nations get financial aid from international organisations for their progress. Some say that financial assistance is of the utmost importance for these nations, whereas others consider that practical aid and guidance are the crucial than money. However, this essay discusses both views and I strongly agree with the former opinion for the following reasons.

Some people argue that fashion items cost too much money. Others say that this is acceptable because fashion is an important part of life. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion

Fully explain your ideas

What skills are taught in school in comparison to what is needed in actual life

Some people think that global environmental problems should be dealt with globally. Others think that they should be solved locally. What is your opinion

More developing countries are given aid from international organziations to help them in their development plans. Some people argue that financial aid is important but others suggest that practical aid and advice are more important. Discuss both views and give your opinion