Some people say History is one of the most important school subjects. Other people think that, in today's world, subjects like Sience and Technology are more important than History. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#people #history #school #subjects #world #sience #technology

Schools which follow

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

traditional education

has

Correct subject-verb agreement

have

show examples

taught the same topics since ancient times.

Therefore

, many people argue that '

History

' should be widely learnt, considering it one of the vital subjects.

Nevertheless

, there are many other topics to be taught in order to acquire integral knowledge. I consider

that

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

all subjects

are

Wrong verb form

to be

show examples

crucial not only

Change preposition

show examples

high school but

also

Change preposition

show examples

middle school. In

this

essay, I will explain my reasons in detail.

To begin

with, all

students

should learn about the

history

of their countries

as well as

the most preponderant worldwide historical events because it leads to a sense of belonging.

Besides

, it is well known that those who have no knowledge about their own

history

will have the same defeats.

Additionally

, since most countries in the world follow

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

democracy and

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

suffrage as representations of their population, everyone must know how to vote conscientiously by learning their entire

history

For example

, in Colombia,

there

Correct pronoun usage

show examples

was proved that most people do not know about their most crucial events in the past,

thus

they avoid voting because there are no forms to justify their elections.

On the other hand

, humankind should learn about more skills, mainly those that are considered cutting-edge tools.

This

is exemplified by 'Technology' and 'Science' which are crucial topics that should be known by humanity.

As a consequence

this

, nowadays, learning about programming code, machine learning, and artificial intelligence is mandatory in almost all schools.

For instance

, in 2020, there was

Remove the article

apply

show examples

research performed in the United States which

shown

Wrong verb form

showed

show examples

that most people who graduated from any

undergraduated

Correct your spelling

undergraduate

program should acquire those techniques in order to have

more rate

Replace the word

a higher

show examples

rate of employability.

To sum up

, all subjects are crucial to be taught by

students

either during high school or

universities

Fix the agreement mistake

university

show examples

in order to raise integral

students

Nevertheless

, most

students

should focus on their own skills.

Submitted by luciaagudelomotta on Tue Jun 04 2024

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task achievement

You can improve Task Response by providing a more balanced discussion. Give equal attention to both views in the body paragraphs.

task achievement

Ensure you clearly state your opinion in the introduction and conclusion to make your stance unmistakable.

coherence cohesion

Try to connect your ideas more smoothly between sentences and paragraphs. This will make your essay easier to read and follow.

coherence cohesion

Review the use of complex sentences to improve clarity and ensure grammatical accuracy.

task achievement

The essay provides a thorough discussion of both viewpoints, covering the importance of history as well as science and technology.

task achievement

Relevant and specific examples are used effectively to support the main points, such as the example of Colombia and the US research.

coherence cohesion

The essay is well-structured with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion.

coherence cohesion

The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points of the essay.

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14Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
14Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

312 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people say History is one of the most important school subjects. Other people think that, in today's world, subjects like Sience and Technology are more important than History. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.

group or team activities can teach more important skills for life than those activities which are done alone. do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that the media has to right to publish detail of people’s view, while other thinks it should be controlled. Discuss both views.

Childcare training courses should be mandatory for all parents. Do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give your own opinion and include relevant examples.