IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Do you believe that self-driving cars will become common in the near future? Why or why not? Support your answer with reasons and expamles from your own knowledge or experiencTe.

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In recent years,some automobile companies have started the production of autonomous cars which is becoming a global threat. Personally, I am of the opinion that robotic cars will be less common or completely extinct from the world in the
nearest
Correct word choice
near
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 future.
This
 essay will
be discussing
Wrong verb form
discuss
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 the reasons for my opinion with a relevant example.
Firstly
, a driverless auto can become a source of road traffic accidents
due to
 machine dilemmas.
For example
, in a situation
whereby
Correct your spelling
where
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 if the car turns right, it will hit a tree and hurt the passenger and if it turns left,it will hit a crossing pedestrian,
this
 dilemma can lead to an accident.
Secondly
, the risk of being hacked, since it is a machine,the possibility of being hacked by criminals is high and it can cause machine errors or failure which might have been avoided if it
is
Wrong verb form
had been
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 controlled by the user.
Thirdly
,job loss is another issue,
this
 can affect those who depend on driving to make a living
such
 as truck drivers, taxis and bus drivers because they might not be able to take care of their expenses.
Additionally
,the cost of getting a self-driving car is worth a fortune and
this
 may discourage people from purchasing
such
 a motorcar.
For instance
, a normal automobile can
cause
Verb problem
cost
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 25,000 dollars but a robotic car can triple that amount since it produces more expensive and robotic products. In summary, autonomous cars may have some positive effects but the disadvantages are the main reasons why they might not be common in the future.
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coherence cohesion
Your essay provides a clear structure with a solid introduction and conclusion. However, make sure to avoid minor grammatical errors and awkward phrasing that can disrupt the flow. E.g., 'this dilemma can lead to an accident' would be better stated as 'this dilemma can result in an accident'.
task achievement
To strengthen your argument, provide more specific examples. For instance, you could mention actual incidents of self-driving cars being involved in accidents, or studies that discuss the potential job losses due to automation.
coherence cohesion
Avoid repetitive expressions. In your essay, phrases like 'machine dilemmas' and 'risk of being hacked' could be varied to maintain reader interest. Use synonyms or rephrase sentences for diversity.
introduction conclusion present
Your introduction clearly states your viewpoint and sets the stage for your arguments, which helps the reader understand your position from the outset.
clear comprehensive ideas
You have effectively raised several valid concerns about self-driving cars, including machine dilemmas, hacking risks, and job losses, which adds depth to your argument.
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