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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The map shows the plan for a new factory complex and housing area for employees

The map shows the plan for a new factory complex and housing area for employees
#plan #factory #area #employees
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The given
map
Use synonyms
 illustrates the future plan for a new factory complex and residence fares for employees. It is divided
five
Change preposition
into five
show examples
 main segments into industrial
areas
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, housing
areas
Use synonyms
 and gymnastic
areas
Use synonyms
.
As it
Correct word choice
It
show examples
 can be seen
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
the
center
Change the spelling
centre
show examples
area
Use synonyms
 would be situated main industrial
areas
Use synonyms
 which
was
Change the verb form
were
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 surrounded by a roundabout, and
also
Linking Words
 would
locate
Wrong verb form
be located
show examples
in
Change preposition
at
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 a crossroad from east to west, and from north to south.
Linking Words
This
Change the determiner
This area
These areas
show examples
areas
Use synonyms
 can be only entered via
east
Correct article usage
the east
show examples
 road.
In addition
Linking Words
, another industrial
Use synonyms
areas
Replace the adjective
area
show examples
 is based on the southeastern corner of the
map
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where
Correct word choice
which
show examples
 is far from residences mainly because of
isolation
Correct article usage
the isolation
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 of
noice
Correct your spelling
noise
 it might generate. An office and a meeting room would
situate
Wrong verb form
be situated
show examples
 at the northwest and the southeast, respectively. They seem to be bevel symmetry. Moving to housing
areas
Use synonyms
,
it is clear that
Linking Words
 the biggest scale of residential place would be arranged at the northwestern corner of
this
Linking Words
 region,
the
Correct word choice
and the
show examples
 second big scale
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
housing
area
Use synonyms
 would be located at the
west most
Correct your spelling
westmost
show examples
 of the
map
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 which is just adjacent
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
 the main west-east road, with a parking around the housing
areas
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 where people could walk around, indicating factory designed a relaxed working atmosphere to employees. The
last
Linking Words
 minimum housing
area
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 would be arranged at the northeastern of the
map
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 with a swimming pool aside, which means people could take
apart
Correct your spelling
part
show examples
 in some regular physical exercise there.
To sum up
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 factory would be designed
to
Change preposition
into
show examples
 different parts to provide
working
Add an article
a working
the working
show examples
 place and living
area
Use synonyms
seperately
Correct your spelling
separately
, which would apply
work-life
Correct article usage
a work-life
show examples
 balance atmosphere to employees.
Submitted by xhwangg1231 on

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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 71%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words map, areas, area with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "map" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
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