TASK 2: WHEN ASKED TO CHOOSE BETWEEN A LIFE WITHOUT WORK AND WORKING MOST OF THE TIME, PEOPLE WOULD ALWAYS CHOOSE NOT TO WORK. DO YOU AGREE OR DISAGREE WITH THIS STATEMENT?
To choose between a
life
which
Change preposition
in which
public
Correct article usage
the public
do
not have to Correct subject-verb agreement
does
work
and a life
demands
everyone to Correct pronoun usage
that demands
work
most of the time
, there is a majority of people who want to live a life
with no production. However
, this
writer believes that humans need to be hard-working every day due to
its benefit
in financial enhancement and Fix the agreement mistake
benefits
work
promotion
.
It is vital to understand that if human live a hard-working life
they can easily improve their finance. It is true that when crowd
produce in a long term or an extra shift they can earn more money. Correct article usage
a crowd
For instance
, an employee who works on holidays can get more money from their boss or company because they have to work
while
they can relax and enjoy their own vacation. Thus
, working most of the time
can help a lot in improving human finance.
Another key component of the case for working in a
long term is Correct article usage
the
work
promotion
. It should be self-evident that if crowd
spend more Correct article usage
the crowd
time
workingwork
, they can easily get the Correct your spelling
working
work
promotion
because of their attempts which is clear evidence of their contribution to the company and they have to sacrifice their spare time
merely to work
. As a consequence
, these efforts will help them to be more promoted in their career path. Therefore
, working for a long period of life
can help them get a job promotion
.
In conclusion, being hard working most of the time
can help humans to get financial enhancement and job promotion
. Therefore
, it should have been demonstrated that working most of the time
is an essential part of each human’s life
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coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear structure and develops your points logically. However, there are some minor grammatical issues and awkward phrases that can be improved. For example, "if human live a hard-working life" should be "if humans live a hard-working life."
task achievement
Further, adding more relevant and specific examples would make your argument stronger. For example, besides mentioning an employee working on holidays, you could talk about how overtime could lead to greater savings or investments.
task achievement
The essay provides a clear response to the task and logically supports your opinion with reasons including financial benefits and job promotion.
coherence cohesion
A structured introduction and conclusion help in presenting your points clearly.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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