THE CHART BELOW GIVES INFORMATION ON NUMBER OF WORKERS IN DIFFERENT OCCUPATIONS WHO MIGRATED TO AUSTRALIA BETWEEN 2009 AND 2012. SUMMARISE THE INFORMATION BY SELECTING AND REPORTING THE MAIN FEATURES, AND MAKE COMPARISONS WHERE RELEVANT.

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The given bar chart illustrates information about the

proporation

Correct your spelling

proportion

proportions

of workers in various

career

Fix the agreement mistake

careers

show examples

that migrated to Australia from 2009 to 2012. The units are measured in percentage.

Overall

Linking Words

, it can be seen that

cook

Use synonyms

and software engineer had

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

similar highest figures in 2011

while

Linking Words

accountant had the maximum in 2010.

Additionally

Linking Words

, computer

programmar

Correct your spelling

programming

had the lowest over 4 years. Looking at the figures in

further

Linking Words

detail, it

can

Verb problem

show examples

obvious the amount of

accountant

Fix the agreement mistake

accountants

show examples

stood at 20

thousand

Use synonyms

and reached a high top

about

Change preposition

of about

show examples

thousand

Use synonyms

then

Linking Words

ending up at 21

thousand

Use synonyms

in 2012.

By contrast

Linking Words

Add an article

the computer

show examples

computer

Fix the agreement mistake

computers

show examples

had

Correct article usage

the

show examples

same number at 2

thousand

Use synonyms

in both years 2009 and 2011.

Additonally

Correct your spelling

Additionally

, in 2010 and 2012 it was a noticeable increase at 4

thousand

Use synonyms

and 5

thousand

Use synonyms

respectively. Turning to the remaining data,

cook

Use synonyms

and engineer both reached a high top in 2011 with 18 and 21

thousand

Use synonyms

. In 2010, software stood at 20.

By contrast

Linking Words

Use synonyms

cook

Correct article usage

the cook

show examples

reached a low bottom at 16. In 2009,

cook

Use synonyms

and software accounted for 17 and 19

thousand

Use synonyms

respectively.

Tue Jun 04 2024

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "by contrast".

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words cook, thousand with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "reached" was used 3 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "stood" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.

▼

6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

175 words

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THE CHART BELOW GIVES INFORMATION ON NUMBER OF WORKERS IN DIFFERENT OCCUPATIONS WHO MIGRATED TO AUSTRALIA BETWEEN 2009 AND 2012. SUMMARISE THE INFORMATION BY SELECTING AND REPORTING THE MAIN FEATURES, AND MAKE COMPARISONS WHERE RELEVANT.

Countries often give money to poorer countries, but it does not solve poverty. Therefore, developed countries should give other type of help to the poor countries rather than financial aid. To what extent do you agree?

In many countries, a small number of people earn extremely high salaries. Some people believe that this is good for the country, but others think that governments should not allow salaries above a certain level. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some people say that economic development is necessary to reduce the poverty in the world. Others say that economic growth should be stopped immediately lo stop damaging the environment. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Some people think that parents should teach their children how to be good members of society. Others, however, believe that school is the best place to learn this. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.