Many people who care for the elderly do not have enugh time to look after them. What are the problems related to this? What are some possible solutions?

Presently, there are some elderly
carer
Fix the agreement mistake
carers
show examples
cannot
Correct pronoun usage
who cannot
show examples
even take
care
of themselves
due to
their
time
management between
work
and life.
However
,
this
can be tackled by flexible working arrangements like working from home. It is vital to understand that it is a significant challenge to manage
balance
Correct word choice
and balance
show examples
time
between
work
and life, especially when they have
work
commitments. There is no doubt that they are very
bsy
Correct your spelling
busy
, their
time
not
Add a missing verb
is not
show examples
just for the aged or
work
but
also
their
Change preposition
for their
show examples
children, they have to spend
time
raising their son or daughter which can lead up to
lack
Correct article usage
a lack
show examples
of
time
care
Fix the infinitive
to care
show examples
for themselves.
As a result
, they just have little
time
for them.
Therefore
, it is easy to understand why some people who
care
for the elderly
cannot
Verb problem
do not
show examples
have enough
time
to take
care
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
them. Cost implications
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
another essential element in
this
case.
In other words
, they have to spend money on nutritional supplements, medicine and health insurance, which
mean
Correct subject-verb agreement
means
show examples
they do not have enough account balance for their consumption.
This
, in turn, will take their opportunity to look after themselves, a chance for them to be taken
care
of.
Time
management is a major obstacle but can be dealt with by
Correct article usage
a more
show examples
more
Correct article usage
a more
show examples
flexible working schedule. By
work
Wrong verb form
working
show examples
from home or
be
Wrong verb form
being
show examples
more flexible in their
time
of
work
, they will have more
time
for their children and even for themselves.
Additionally
, they can share responsibility for providing
care
between different family members which will help them alleviate stress.
Moreover
,
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
can provide financial support which can help both senior citizens and elderly carers.
Thus
, taking
care
of themselves is very important no matter how busy they are. It is a major obstacle to
manage
Wrong verb form
managing
show examples
balance
Add an article
the balance
a balance
show examples
between
work
and life,
however
, all these problems can be addressed by
suitable
Correct article usage
a suitable
show examples
timetable and
authorities's
Correct article usage
the authorities's
show examples
financial assistance.
Submitted by [email protected] on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Focus on providing more relevant and specific examples to support your points. This will make your arguments stronger and more convincing.
task achievement
Work on creating clearer and more comprehensive ideas. Try breaking down complex concepts into simpler points for easier understanding.
coherence cohesion
Improve the logical structure of your essay. This can be done by ensuring that each paragraph flows smoothly into the next, with clear transitions between points.
coherence cohesion
Make sure that each paragraph supports the main points in a clear and organized manner. Try to avoid any repetitions and stay focused on the topic.
task achievement
Your essay provides a complete response to the task, addressing both the problems and solutions related to elderly care.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are present, providing a clear starting and ending point for your essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: