IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

The process below shows how drinking water is made using solar power. Write a report for the university lecturer describing the information given below.

#process #water #power #report #university #lecturer #information
The process illustrates how drinking
water
 is produced with the use of solar energy.
It is clear that
 the process of making drinkable
water
 involves 5 main stages as pointed out below. It begins when energy from sunlight is collected and ends with taking the
water
 produced for use. The first
stage
 commences when solar energy is accumulated using a solar panel and
then
 it is transformed into electricity. The conversion of light into electricity is known as the photovoltaic phenomenon. Next comes the second
stage
, in which a pump running on electricity is employed to force natural
water
 up a pipe.
This
 pipe connects the pump with a filter, whose function is to purify natural
water
, making it drinkable. After the purification
stage
 is the storage
stage
, where decontaminated
water
 is stored in a tank placed
upon
Change preposition
on
show examples
 a wooden platform. Clean
water
 can be drawn from
this
 tank for different purposes like drinking or cooking, and
this
 brings the process to an end.
Submitted by [email protected] on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Consider adding a very brief conclusion to neatly wrap up the process description.
task achievement
Incorporate more varied vocabulary and perhaps deeper explanation in the second step regarding how electricity powers the pump.
task achievement
Slight expansion on specific examples related to the use of purified water can make the explanation richer and more comprehensive.
coherence cohesion
The introduction is clear and appropriately sets the stage for the following explanation.
coherence cohesion
Stages of the process are logically ordered and explained with clear, sequential language.
task achievement
Clear and comprehensive ideas are provided, making it easy to follow the process.
task achievement
The essay provides a complete response by covering all critical stages from energy collection to usage of purified water.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: