IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 2.5

We should protect the environment.Do you agree or disagree

#environment
The
environment
 is evidence of our alive and
existence
Correct article usage
the existence
show examples
 of the earth.  The
environment
 is the natural surroundings around us. When we talk about protecting the
environment
, that means protecting it from the damaging effects of
people
.  Protecting the
environment
 is a very important thing because it is almost about degradation.  Protecting the
environment
 means salvaging and taking care of it from damage.  
Firstly
, information about protecting the
environment
 should be disseminated among
people
 on our planet,
that is
 to say,
people
 must know what they should do to protect the
environment
.   Degradation of the
environment
 will be stopped.
People
 should be encouraged to plant trees. The
threes
Correct your spelling
trees
show examples
 in forests on our planet must be prevented from being cut down. Some kinds of trees are decreasing because of cutting down forests.  We must remember that trees are the only source of oxygen on the earth.
Submitted by nazirovmuhammad71 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task Achievement
The essay should develop ideas more fully, providing clearer and more detailed arguments to support the position taken. For example, you could discuss specific environmental issues, such as pollution or climate change, and explain why protecting the environment in these contexts is crucial.
Coherence and Cohesion
Try to enhance the logical flow of the essay. It would be beneficial to have more transitions between paragraphs and ideas to improve overall cohesion. For example, use linking phrases like 'Furthermore', 'In addition', etc.
Content
The essay acknowledges the importance of protecting the environment and offers some basic ideas on how to do so, such as planting trees and preventing deforestation.
Coherence and Cohesion
'Firstly' is effectively used to introduce the first main point, helping in structuring the response.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Biodiversity
  • Ecological balance
  • Renewable resources
  • Greenhouse gas emissions
  • Ecotourism
  • Environmental degradation
  • Sustainable development
  • Conservation efforts
  • Ecosystem services
  • Pollution prevention
  • Natural habitats
  • Wildlife protection
  • Climate resilience
  • Resource management
  • Stewardship
What to do next:
Look at other essays: