Being a celebrity- such as a famous film star or sports personality- brings problems as well as benefits. Do you think that being a celebrity brings more benefits or more problems?
Nowadays, being a celebrity
such
as an artist or sports person
is the most ambitious of everyone especially Gen Zee, because this
is the easiest way to gain income on a high scale. However
, there are more problems
to be faced when someone chooses to be a famous customer in their life. I will discuss a couple of cases above according to
my opinion and another person
's.
It is a general secret that famous person
brings benefits as well as
problems
to their lives because they live on monitoring everyone. For instance
, film stars have a job to entertain and all of us are able to see their performance on TV, and this
occupation has a big income for them. They can gain a billion money for one film project, therefore
making them rich body on the term time. Besides
, a sports personality has a good skill in some exercises such
as football, riding, badminton, and anything else. They can gain more money from their performance on the field or trajectory. In addition
, they can get a lot of money from endorsements because of their fame.
On the other hand
, being a famous person
can lead them to more problems
in their lives because of lack of privacy. For instance
, when a famous person
goes anywhere for a holiday. they are unable to avoid the media or people who want to take pictures with them. This
case can lead them to an inconvenient life because of loss
of their freedom. Correct article usage
the loss
In addition
, when a famous person
has a household problem, they will be hunted by the media or those who want to know about their problem, therefore
they can't hide the problems
from others and will be a
Correct article usage
apply
general
discussed.
In conclusion, being a famous Change the word
generally
person
will bring more benefits for them and easier to be a rich person
, besides
, have many drawbacks for them because they are unable to hide their lives from other people.Submitted by patricius.yohanes on
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task achievement
Consider refining the introduction to state a clear thesis, outlining whether you believe being a celebrity brings more problems or benefits, and briefly mention the main points you will discuss.
task achievement
In addition to stating your own opinion, integrating quotes or referenced studies can make the essay more robust and convincing.
coherence cohesion
Work on smooth transitions between paragraphs to enhance the logical flow; currently, some parts feel somewhat fragmented.
coherence cohesion
Make sure you are consistently using the same tense, and refine sentences to eliminate errors in grammar and phrasing.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are clearly presented, which helps guide the reader through your essay.
coherence cohesion
You have divided your essay into distinct paragraphs that each address different points related to the topic.
task achievement
You have identified both benefits and drawbacks associated with being a celebrity and have provided explanations and examples.