Сountries are becoming more and more similar because people are able to buy the same products anywhere in the world. Do you think that it is positive or negative development?
Nowadays, almost all
countries
in the world are getting extremely alike to each other and the reason is that we have access to the
similar products and services and have international social networks which Correct article usage
apply
incorporates
Change the verb form
incorporate
whole
world, I personally believe that Change the article
the whole
this
globalization
has both plus and minus points and we can not surely stand with one side whether it is good or bad. In this
essay
Add a comma
essay,
i
will give my opinion on that and try to draw some conclusions.
Change the capitalization
I
To begin
with why globalization
is problem
, Add an article
a problem
the problem
Firstly
because it facilitates to losing
Replace the word
loss
the
Change preposition
of the
countries
own values, Change noun form
country's
countries'
customs
and traditions
because when all countries
are getting alike it means that people will strive to look up to each other, naturally it will lead to that people will start forgetting their customs
and traditions
which always make them unique and differentiate them from others, For example
: as we can see now in most cases, the new generations try to mimic and observe Western values and traditions
which may lead to vanishing own countries
customs
and traditions
.
Second
major drawback of Add an article
The second
A second
globalization
is that that is
sometimes used to intervene other
Change preposition
in other
countries
Change noun form
countries'
country's
businessess
, Correct your spelling
businesses
systems
or even start Correct word choice
and systems
war
and The USA perfectly embodies that, The USA invaded and Add an article
a war
the war
mess
everything up in a lot of Wrong verb form
messed
countries
such
as Iraq, Libya, Syria and so on. Moreover
the USA totally eradicated the infrastructure of that Add a comma
Moreover,
countries
and killed so many civilians Fix the agreement mistake
country
at
that country and Change preposition
in
their
main reason Change the word
the
of
that because they were different and Change preposition
for
do
not share their values.
Wrong verb form
did
However
, On another
Correct determiner usage
the
Correct word choice
other hand
hand
the Add a comma
hand,
globalization
Correct subject-verb agreement
brings
bring
Correct subject-verb agreement
brings
Fix the agreement mistake
benefits
benefit
Fix the agreement mistake
benefits
Change preposition
to
in
some extent, and the main Change preposition
to
Fix the agreement mistake
advantage
advantages
is that if any country Fix the agreement mistake
advantage
experience
hardships Correct subject-verb agreement
experiences
Correct pronoun usage
others
Fix the agreement mistake
others
other
will not be careless and try to help Fix the agreement mistake
others
Change preposition
apply
to
that country which is in the trouble, Change preposition
apply
For example
, when Palestine are
facing Change the verb form
is
Change preposition
apply
with
oppression and being displaced from their own land, Change preposition
apply
almost
whole world go on strike and try to protest against Add an article
the almost
oppressor
All things considered, in my point of view Add an article
the oppressor
an oppressor
globalization
has both advantages and disadvantages, however
minus Add the comma(s)
however,
point
Fix the agreement mistake
points
such
as interfering to
other Change preposition
with
countries
Change noun form
countries'
country's
system
and using that as Fix the agreement mistake
systems
reason
to start wars, Add an article
a reason
Additionally
it assists to
forgetting own Change preposition
in
traditions
and customs
. But we should consider that it may be useful when it comes to providing aid and helping other nations.Submitted by makemoneyizzy16 on
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task response
Work on further developing each argument to provide more depth and stronger supporting details. This can help raise your task response score.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear central idea and flows logically to the next. Transitions between ideas can be smoother.
coherence and cohesion
Try to avoid run-on sentences and aim for clearer sentence structures for better readability.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps frame the discussion effectively.
task response
Relevant examples, such as references to the USA and Palestine, are used to support the main points.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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