The tendency of news reports in the media to focus more on problems and emergencies rather than on positive developments is harmful to the individuals and the society as a whole. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
It's often argued whether news
channels
production of violence rather than advancements and growth can negatively damage both the public and Change noun form
channels'
channel's
individuals
. I completely agree that producing more negative content benefits individuals
, communities, and news agencies.
To begin
with, I feel that it's essential to reveal dissents through the media. By doing this
, evoking residents in the country is unpreventable. When unrest emerges as a result
of that, the authority is easily pursuaded
to get hold of solutions to the cause of the issue. Correct your spelling
persuaded
For example
, the media should report when the costs of stable food rises
in order Change the verb form
rise
that
the government aware of the scale of its impacts. Correct word choice
for
In addition
to that, sometimes the state isn't aware of the hassle is inexistence unless reporters release information about it.
Moreover
, unwanted reports on the
television or newspapers Correct article usage
apply
are
not Verb problem
do
dealt
often times personal Wrong verb form
deal
matter
, Fix the agreement mistake
matters
as a result
, they don’t often incite negative response
. Fix the agreement mistake
responses
For example
, in my country, the
television Correct article usage
apply
are
often streamed Change the verb form
is
the
current events related Correct article usage
apply
terrorism
or vile crimes more than developments taking place region in the country. These narratives are concerned Change preposition
to terrorism
to
the public; they aren’t intended to make the Change preposition
with
individuals
feel sad about it.
In summary, bad news can help the public and individuals
positively. The outcry of the community helps those in charge swiflty
look for solutions. Releasing data Correct your spelling
swiftly
and
statistics and so on related to hassles collectively Correct word choice
apply
motivate
finding solutions.Correct subject-verb agreement
motivates
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task achievement
Clarify your stance in the introduction. While you state that you completely agree, the following statement about benefits is confusing. Ensure that your position is clear from the beginning.
coherence cohesion
Organize your essay clearly with topic sentences that directly reflect the point you want to make. This will help guide the reader and improve logical structure.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples and elaborate on them to strengthen your arguments. For example, mentioning specific events where media coverage led to governmental action would be helpful.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that you thoroughly explain how each point you make supports your overall argument. For instance, clarify why reporting negative news can lead to positive change and how this benefits society and individuals.
task achievement
Your essay touches upon several relevant points, such as government responsiveness and the role of the media in public awareness.
coherence cohesion
You successfully included an introduction and a conclusion, providing a frame for your essay.
task achievement
Your writing shows a fair understanding of the essay topic and includes an effort to present clear ideas.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite
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