IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people believe that volunteer work should be a requirement for teenagers in high schools (for instance working for a charity). To what extend do you agree or disagree?

#people #volunteer #work #requirement #teenagers #schools #charity
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several individuals agree that volunteer work would
Add a missing verb
be reqire
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reqire
Correct your spelling
required
 for the teens in high schools.
This
Linking Words
 writer firmly contends that teenagers need to practise more about
the
Correct article usage
apply
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life
Use synonyms
 skills and develop good emotions in the charity area. first of all, a fund is a valuable space to improve knowledge, make
the
Correct article usage
apply
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human
Fix the agreement mistake
humans
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 more active and get people to a
lot
Use synonyms
 of places to see and sympathize with the
homelessness
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homeless
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. So, it is an opportunity for
community
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the community
show examples
 to experience, explore and gain more information in
life
Use synonyms
.
For instance
Linking Words
, Vietnamese society
celebrate
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celebrates
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 a
lot
Use synonyms
 of volunteer
works
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work
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 and
gain
Correct subject-verb agreement
gains
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 most of
attention
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the attention
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 from the young, they believe that it is a chance for them to enjoy
the
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apply
show examples
life
Use synonyms
 and engage in
clean
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cleaning
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 to protect the environment.
secondly
Linking Words
, donation is an area in which changes thinking and know how people see the things around them. It makes the teens find the meaning of their
life
Use synonyms
, love and
cosset
Verb problem
cherish
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 the things they own.
For example
Linking Words
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
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charity organizations often send population to the unknown
place
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places
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specially
Replace the word
especially
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 the poor
one
Correct pronoun usage
ones
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,
at
Change preposition
apply
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there, the learners have to do a
lot
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 of things to survive and make ends meet.
Thus
Linking Words
 it would make folks
become
Verb problem
apply
show examples
calm down and think accurately in any
situations
Fix the agreement mistake
situation
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. in conclusion, volunteer work is a chance to educate
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
learners
especially
Add the comma(s)
, especially
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 teens and the young because
in
Change preposition
at
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 that
ages
Fix the agreement mistake
age
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, it has a
lot
Use synonyms
 of changes in physical health and
bodies
Fix the agreement mistake
body
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 so
may be
Correct your spelling
maybe
show examples
donation
Fix the agreement mistake
donations
show examples
 can help them to fill up their space and complete their behaviour.
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Introduction
Ensure your introduction clearly states your position on the topic and briefly mentions the main points you will discuss.
Development
You should work on developing your main points more fully. Each paragraph should have a clear topic sentence followed by detailed explanations and relevant examples.
Coherence
Improve the connection between sentences and paragraphs. Use linking words and phrases to ensure a smooth flow of ideas.
Language
Work on reducing grammatical and spelling errors to ensure clarity in your essay.
Task Achievement
You made a clear effort to address the topic and to support your ideas.
Logical Structure
The structure of your essay shows a logical progression of ideas.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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