IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

a magazine wants to include contributions from its readers for an article called 'the book that influenced me most" write a letter to the editor of the magazine about the book that influenced you most. In your letter describe what this book was about explain how this book influenced you say whether this book would be likely to influence other people

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Dear Sir or Madam, I am
writting
Correct your spelling
writing
 with regard to the article called "the book that
influeced
Correct your spelling
influenced
 me most" that you wanted to include contributions from readers in 5th issue of your magazine. The most impressive book that I
had
Unnecessary verb
apply
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read was "The Green House" which was about a group of
animals
Use synonyms
 which live
in
Change preposition
on
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 a farm.
This
Linking Words
 book helps me to be familiar with living in a group and its advantages and disadvantages. To explain more,
This
Linking Words
 story was about different
animals
Use synonyms
 who
lives
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live
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at
Change preposition
on
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 the farm. The farmer used to kill one of the
animals
Use synonyms
 on a regular basis. Each of them
tought
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taught
thought
 which
is
Wrong verb form
was
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 better than
others
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the others
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 and it was not killed at all.
Therefore
Linking Words
, there
was
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were
show examples
 not any movements in that society against
landlord
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landlords
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.
Finally
Linking Words
, all of the
animals
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 were killed by the farmer. In my idea, it would be likely to influence other audiences of your magazine. Owing to encouraging people to
doing
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do
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team work
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teamwork
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 activities and being supportive, I would be very
impressive
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impressed
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. I look forward to
recieving
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receiving
 a response based on my ideas. Yours faithfully, Mahshid Ka

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task achievement
Provide more specific examples of how the book influenced you personally to enhance the completeness of the response.
coherence cohesion
Use linking words and phrases more effectively to improve the logical structure of your letter.
coherence cohesion
The letter has an appropriate greeting and closing, creating a professional tone.
coherence cohesion
Each paragraph presents a single idea, making the letter clear and easy to follow.
task achievement
The writing tone is generally suitable for addressing an editor, being polite and formal.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • influenced
  • contributions
  • readers
  • 'The Alchemist'
  • Paulo Coelho
  • embarks
  • journey
  • personal legend
  • valuable
  • life lessons
  • inspiring
  • pursue
  • themes
  • following one's heart
  • seeking adventure
  • embracing the unknown
  • resonate
  • wide range
  • potential
  • inspire
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