in recent years, there has been a rise in the use of performance-enhancing drugs in sports. What are the consequences of doping for athletes? What measures should be taken to combat this issue?

From
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In
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the past few years, the use of banned
drugs
in
the
Correct article usage
apply
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competitive games has
become
Verb problem
apply
show examples
surged drastically in order to boost
athlete's'
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athletes'
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performance, resulting
into
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in
show examples
a number of alarming consequences
what
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that
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should be highlighted and
be
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apply
show examples
addressed at the earliest by finding
out
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apply
show examples
some appropriate
solution
Fix the agreement mistake
solutions
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of
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for
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the same. Both
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
the outcomes and
solutions
will be discussed in the following paragraphs. When it comes to the results of the use of performance-enhancing
drugs
, the major and fatal
consequence
Fix the agreement mistake
consequences
show examples
can be seen physically and psychologically. The consumption of these
drugs
can affect the heartbeat;
increase
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and increase
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or increase the speed of blood circulation.
As a result
, a sportsman may
dies
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die
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due to
heartbeat fluctuations.
Likewise
, the frequent use of
drugs
leads
and
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apply
show examples
athlete
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athletes
show examples
to guilt, anxiety, and stress which not only jeopardize athlete's career but
also
their mental health.
Thus
,
does
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
a small amount of high-spirits
drugs
can have severe ripple effects.
For example
, a report published by the World Health Organization has stated that
steroids
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steroid
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ejaculation is the prominent drug,
what
Correct word choice
that
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causes 1/4
deaths
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of deaths
show examples
of the weight-lifters. When it comes to the
solutions
, the most effective one, I believe, is the stricter drug testing protocols. To be more specific, the dope tests prior to the competitive games may sound like a prudent approach that sports authorities can take in order to combat doping.
Secondly
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
immediate action should be necessary, if a
sports person
Correct your spelling
sportsperson
show examples
failed
Wrong verb form
fails
show examples
in anti-drug testing.
The
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Government officials ought to introduce stringent laws, including harsher penalties for offenders. Only by recognizing strict punishments the sports individuals
will
Verb problem
apply
show examples
think twice before taking any performance-boosting substance. To cite an example, after finding
out
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apply
show examples
two swimmers guilty
for
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of
show examples
consuming
drugs
in the Commonwealth Games, the authorities imposed longer bands, have your fines, and advanced their drug detection technologies. In conclusion, as every problem comes with its own
Solutions
,
similarly
, the issue of rising performance-enhancing
drugs
for better performance has both causes
as well as
solutions
. I opine that to resolve
this
problem the government needs to take certain stringent yardsticks.
Submitted by rajwants.1997 on

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Grammar
Proofread for minor grammatical errors, such as incorrect verb forms (e.g., 'may dies' should be 'may die') and article usage (e.g., 'the heartbeat' should be 'heartbeat').
Vocabulary
The essay could benefit from more precise vocabulary and varied sentence structures to convey ideas more clearly and effectively. Avoiding phrases like 'a number of' and using more specific terms can make your argument stronger.
Task Achievement
Try to provide more detailed and specific examples or data to support your points. This will enhance the credibility of your arguments and demonstrate thorough understanding.
Coherence and Cohesion
The paragraphs can be linked more effectively using transition words or phrases (e.g., 'In addition', 'Moreover'). This improves the flow of the essay and enhances coherence.
Introduction
The introduction effectively sets the context for the discussion on doping and its related issues in sports.
Task Achievement
The essay identifies two distinct points related to consequences (physical and psychological effects) and solutions (testing protocols and legal actions), showing a balanced approach towards analyzing the problem.
Conclusion
There is a clear conclusion that summarizes the points made in the essay and offers a concise opinion on the need for government intervention.

Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Performance-enhancing drugs (PEDs)
  • Doping
  • Anabolic steroids
  • Health ramifications
  • Stigmatization
  • Disqualification
  • Anti-doping agencies
  • Therapeutic Use Exemptions (TUEs)
  • Integrity of sports
  • Biological passport
  • In-competition testing
  • Out-of-competition testing
  • Whistleblower
  • Ban substances
  • Suspension
  • World Anti-Doping Agency (WADA)
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