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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The graph below shows the quantities of goods transported in the UK between 1974 and 2002 by four different modes of transport

The graph below shows the quantities of goods transported in the UK between 1974 and 2002 by four different modes of transport
The diagram illustrates the amount of materials moved in the United Kingdom during the
28 years
Correct your spelling
28-year
 period from nineteen seventy four by various kinds of carriage. I will analyze the information and
than
Replace the word
then
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 examine two important aspects for planning in the future. Let us consider the data in three ways.
First
Add a comma
First,
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 the lowest method of transport is
pipeline
Add an article
a pipeline
the pipeline
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 for material
such
Linking Words
 as liquid,
whereas
Linking Words
 the highest is by
highway
Add an article
the highway
a highway
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.
Secondly
Linking Words
, towards the end of the time span the amounts through the pipeline remain stable,
in contrast
Linking Words
 to the other three which are increasing. For the
last
Linking Words
 use vehicle as a
cars
Correct the article-noun agreement
car
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 is better than those three by the reason of cars are most consume in four types of carriage. We can make
prediction
Add an article
a prediction
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 in two thousand and two in relation to decisions about which sort of transport will be available in the future. In order of capacity, the road network is the top choice.
Linking Words
Last
Change the article
The last
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 choice would be
boat
Add an article
a boat
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 in view of
speed
Correct article usage
the speed
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 and time to travel from one place to another. In my
opinion
Add a comma
opinion,
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 I rather
to
Remove the marker
apply
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take
Correct article usage
a cars
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cars
Fix the agreement mistake
car
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 or
Correct article usage
a train
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train
Correct subject-verb agreement
trains
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 it would be
more
Change the word
apply
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faster than a ship
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
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transport.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "last".
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Basic structure: Change the fifth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fifth paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Transported goods
  • Quantities
  • Trends
  • Modes of transport
  • Rail
  • Road
  • Water
  • Pipeline
  • Fluctuations
  • Predominance
  • Economic influences
  • Societal changes
  • Technological advancements
  • Environmental impact
  • Growth
  • Steady increase/decrease
  • Comparison
  • Period (e.g., decade, years)
  • Examination
  • Implications
  • Analysis
  • Conclusion
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