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Writing Samples
Band 5

Write advantages and disadvantages of co education

Since the revolution of
education
Use synonyms
 in
this
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 era,we have been introduced to various different
education
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 systems .
Co-
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education
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 is
also
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the
Change the article
apply
show examples
part of
this
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 change,playing a pivotal role in bringing the minds of all
genders
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.Despite the mixed views about the topic,it has become important to be aware of
such
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 change,creating both positive and negative impacts in our lives. Talking about the positive perspective,
such
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 a transition of teaching style has promoted equality among all
genders
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.
According to
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this
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,the level of competency among
students
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 has increased,leading them to enhance their capabilities to compete with each other.
Linking Words
moreover
Capitalize word
Moreover
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,
such
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 a mutual
education
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 environment helps
students
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 to eradicate their hesitation
while
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 interacting with other opposite
genders
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.
This
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 just not only increases communication skills but it prepares them to face real-world interactions.if we look
to
Change preposition
at
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real-world examples,the
education
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 style of developed countries like Australia and
United
Correct article usage
the United
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 States,have been promoting
such
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system
Fix the agreement mistake
systems
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.which have
further
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 increased the quality of their workforce and
overall
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 productivity in various sectors. Coming to the other side of the argument,psychologically
students
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 interacting with each other have been seen to lose focus and distraction towards their career goals.The low maturity level of
students
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 in their teenage makes them compelled to engage more in social life,badly affecting their academic performance.Being part of social factors,differences can arise among
students
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 of different
genders
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 resulting in unequal opportunities and treatment given to them.
Additionally
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, sometimes teachers can be
also
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 biased
while
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 making decisions as being more supportive towards a particular gender group. Weighing both sides,
co-
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education
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 has some threats regarding
student’s
Fix the agreement mistake
students’
show examples
 focus towards their future goals but it can be overcome with some restrictions
assuring
Verb problem
ensure
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 a healthy environment
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 pupils.
Co-
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education
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 itself helps to bridge the gender gap and tends to remove the shackles of stereotypes imposed by society.To empower
students
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 to be open-minded we have to replace
co-
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education
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over
Change preposition
with
show examples
 our typical learning style.

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task achievement
Consider including more specific examples or statistical data to strengthen your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Make sure to proofread your essay to correct grammatical errors and improve sentence structure.
task achievement
You presented both advantages and disadvantages of co-education effectively, showing a balanced view.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which help guide the reader.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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