These days, people are forced to leave their family and friends in order to obtain a good job. Do the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages?

These days,
people
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are forced to leave their family and friends in order to obtain a good job. I firmly believe that the disadvantages of
this
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statement outweigh the advantages for many reasons,
such
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as bearing the burden of significant responsibilities, which often require emotional resilience and adaptability. In
this
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essay, I will present the two perspectives and state my opinion in the conclusion.
To begin
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with,
although
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migrating to another country to get better job opportunities boasts substantial benefits, its drawbacks warrant greater consideration.
Firstly
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, when migrating, you will be exposed to several issues,
for example
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, migrants are often vulnerable to emotional challenges
such
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as loneliness and a profound sense of homesickness.
Secondly
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, there will be heavy responsibilities that not everyone is mentally or emotionally prepared to handle.
Not to mention
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, many migrants experience a culture shock when confronted with unfamiliar customs and societal norms.
Also
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, when employees move to a foreign country, they will experience difficulty
while
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learning the country’s language;
as a result
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, it will be difficult for them to interact with other
people
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.
On the other hand
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, there are compelling reasons behind migration.
Although
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they will encounter hardships, they will gain access to better jobs and higher salaries.
This
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step will build many personal growth opportunities, including enhanced independence, improved interpersonal communication, and greater confidence. Taking everything into account, migration has become a widespread issue affecting many
people
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, despite the diversity of its underlying causes. Some
people
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seek higher salaries and better living conditions,
while
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others want reputable careers and higher social status.
Finally
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, I strongly believe that access to stable employment should be a universal right, as its absence compels individuals to abandon their homeland and familial ties in pursuit of economic survival.

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task achievement
Expand on your ideas with more specific examples or personal anecdotes to strengthen your arguments and make your points more tangible for the reader. For instance, include an example of a specific hardship a migrant might face.
coherence/cohesion
Consider adding more linking phrases or transitional words to improve the flow of your essay. This will help guide the reader through your arguments more smoothly.
task achievement
Your essay presents a clear stance on the topic and effectively outlines both perspectives, which is commendable.
coherence/cohesion
The introduction is well-structured and provides a good roadmap for your essay, clearly stating your opinion.
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