Some believe that it is good for a country’s culture to import films and TV programmes, while others think it is better for a country to have their own films and TV programmes. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

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It has been argued by some that foreign
movies
and TV
programmes
should be imported, others state that
country's
Correct article usage
the country's
show examples
culture ought to be
produce
Wrong verb form
produced
show examples
natively. From my perspective, I contend that the growth of cultural
identity
is crucial, rather than the diversity and creativity of imported foreign
films
and
programmes
. On the one hand, local
programmes
and
movies
provide a sense of cultural
identity
. To put it
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
another way,
films
are produced locally by native individuals,
can
Correct word choice
and can
show examples
easily access
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the audiences in light of the understandable and flexible
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
languages
Fix the agreement mistake
language
show examples
. Take Viet Nam's
movies
as a specific example, some historical-related
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
recently become
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
blockbuster
Fix the agreement mistake
blockbusters
show examples
such
as "Dao, Pho and Piano" or "Mui Co Chay" are being used as themed education tools, promoting
young
Correct article usage
the young
show examples
generation to broaden their horizon and fostering a sense of patriotism.
As a result
, if more residents tend to watch local
movies
and
programmes
, they can offer a
help
Change the verb form
helping
show examples
hand in
express
Wrong verb form
expressing
show examples
their manners and
preserve
Wrong verb form
preserving
show examples
cultural
identity
.
On the other hand
, the diversity and appeal
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
foreign
movies
and
programmes
make them a compelling choice for various audiences. To be more specific, the
intrigue
Replace the word
intriguing
show examples
elements in
such
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
foreign
programmes
or
movies
can attract people
from
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of
show examples
all ages.
For instance
,
few
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a few
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years ago, the programme called " Running Man " from Korea was converted into
Vietnamese
Correct article usage
a Vietnamese
show examples
version and widely spread
through
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throughout
show examples
the nation. In light of that people ranging from
elderly
Correct article usage
the elderly
show examples
to youngsters are eager
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
the
innovative
Replace the word
innovation
show examples
, serendipity and
humor
Change the spelling
humour
show examples
in those
type
Fix the agreement mistake
types
show examples
of
programmes
.
Therefore
, motivating them to watch those
programmes
or
films
over and over. From my perspective, I strongly believe that the integral role of native
films
and
programmes
still progressively
appear
Correct subject-verb agreement
appears
show examples
in society.
Although
the attractive
foreign transformed
Add a hyphen
foreign-transformed
show examples
version can be a popular type of
entertainments
Fix the agreement mistake
entertainment
show examples
, the development of cultural
identity
in local
films
need
Correct subject-verb agreement
needs
show examples
to
be maintain
Change the verb form
be maintained
show examples
as well as
advocate
Wrong verb form
advocated
show examples
by the country's audiences In conclusion, both perspectives hold some valid justifications, whatever
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
the preference
of
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for
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native or foreign
movies
and
programmes
. I still support the notion of
crucial
Add an article
the crucial
show examples
role of manifesting patriotism and
identity
in domestic kind of entertainment.

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task achievement
Your introduction clearly outlines both sides of the argument and states your position, which is great. However, ensure you eliminate minor inaccuracies, such as 'country's culture ought to be produce natively' which should be 'ought to produce natively'.
task achievement
Expand on examples to show a deeper understanding and relevance. For instance, delve deeper into how 'Running Man' being adapted in Vietnam impacts local culture.
coherence cohesion
Your points are well-organized, but improving transitions between paragraphs would enhance flow. For instance, start the second body paragraph with a clearer transitional phrase.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph's main idea is clearly linked back to your thesis statement to maintain a cohesive argument.
task achievement
The essay effectively presents both sides of the discussion and provides a clear opinion.
coherence cohesion
The conclusion nicely summarizes the main points and restates the opinion clearly.
task achievement
Examples like 'Dao, Pho and Piano' and 'Running Man' show an effort to provide context and support for your arguments.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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