IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2

In the past, people used to travel abroad to look for many differences from their country. Nowadays, cities throughout the world are becoming more and more similar. What are the reason? Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

#people #travel #differences #country #cities #world #reason
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The
last
 time, many people used to travel
foreign
Change preposition
to foreign
show examples
country
Fix the agreement mistake
countries
show examples
 to look for many differences from their country.
However
,
cities
 on over the world are becoming more and more similar. The writer argues the main reason is global and
to avoid
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that avoiding
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 burnout
Correct subject-verb agreement
outweighs
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outweigh
Correct subject-verb agreement
outweighs
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 the
drawback
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drawbacks
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 of laziness.
Firstly
, they will
make to
Verb problem
apply
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lose
Correct article usage
the cultural
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cultural
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culture
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about
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of
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 traditional countries. Every city will
was
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be
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 of traditional
difference
Fix the agreement mistake
differences
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. If they change
views
Correct pronoun usage
their views
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 in their country,
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
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 will lose
traditionally
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tradition
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.
Moreover
, it will
e
Correct your spelling
be
Correct your spelling
very
vey
Correct your spelling
very
 boring because
cities
 have
views
 similar and
don’t
 have anything interesting
other
Correct word choice
apply
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. So, we should develop that
also
 preserve traditional
cities
.
Secondly
, if
cities
 were changed
similarly
, they
will
Wrong verb form
would
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 do for
tourist
Fix the agreement mistake
tourists
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 can’t operate because similar
cities
don’t
anything
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have anything
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 to visit.
Moreover
, many tourist companies can’t have
differently
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different
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 with other countries. They can find no
views
 that they want to visit.
However
, when they were changed
similarly
cities
Change preposition
to cities
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, tourism
don’t
Wrong verb form
didn’t
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 spend money on
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
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travel from
cities
 to other
cities
.
Moreover
,
cities
 will not be allowed
compete
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to compete
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 and
don’t
Correct your spelling
won’t
 have
problem
Correct article usage
a problem
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war
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with war
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.
To sum up
,
problem
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the problem
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change
Correct subject-verb agreement
changes
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views
at
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in
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cities
 will not have nationally
traditionally
Change the word
traditional
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 sightseeing and
writer
Correct article usage
the writer
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 was
drawback
Add an article
a drawback
show examples
 with changes
Correct determiner usage
apply
show examples
this
.

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task achievement
Work on improving sentence structure and grammar to express ideas more clearly and accurately.
task achievement
Try to include specific examples to illustrate your points more effectively.
coherence cohesion
Organize your essay into clear paragraphs that present and support a single idea or point.
coherence cohesion
Ensure your introduction clearly sets up the topic and your conclusion summarizes your main points effectively.
task achievement
You have identified some relevant points such as the danger to cultural traditions and the potential boredom of similar cities.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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