In some countries, i is illegal for companies to reject job applicants for their age. Is this a positive or negative development?

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Nowadays, in several regions, it is said that legislation has been implemented to prevent companies from rejecting job applicants based on their
age
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. From my point of view,
this
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phenomenon offers lots of benefits for societies. It is obvious that there are many equal opportunities created from
this
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issue. Concerning the former, companies should provide their cities with a fair chance to compete for job positions in the present time.
Therefore
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, residents do not only have various choices for their occupations, but organizations can
also
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have potential talents of all ages.
Furthermore
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, encouraging to evaluate competition fairly by taking into account their qualifications and experiences rather than relying on their
age
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leads to being selected for career positions in
this
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organization.
In addition
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, one of the wide range of positive effects that enacting regulations to prevent rejecting competition based on
age
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brings is creating a diverse work environment.
Hence
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, it does not only foster creativity, innovations and productivity
,
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apply
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but
also
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assistance
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assists
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in the development of quality of a workforce that includes employees from distinctive
age
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groups and perspectives.
As a result
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, companies are more and more dynamic and collaborative. To cite an instance, many youngsters in Vietnam usually introduce and follow the latest trends, and advancements,
while
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older people
also
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share their experiences
while
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working.
Thus
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, it can enhance collaborative work environments without the differences between
age
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groups. In conclusion, in order to bring equal opportunities and a fair atmosphere of work, establishing legislation to prohibit organizations from rejecting job applicants based on their
age
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is a must in modern life.

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task response
Try to ensure that all points and ideas are directly linked to the essay question. Some sentences were slightly off-topic or not fully developed.
coherence cohesion
Maintain a clear logical progression throughout the essay. This will help in presenting your argument more effectively.
introduction conclusion present
The essay has a clear and effective introduction and conclusion, which help in framing the context of the argument.
supported main points
Most main points are well-supported with relevant examples, particularly about the impact on the workplace environment.
logical structure
The logical structure of the essay is strong, making it easy to follow the writer's line of reasoning.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • age diversity
  • combat age discrimination
  • job opportunities
  • experienced individuals
  • vast knowledge
  • suboptimal hiring decisions
  • legal compliance
  • reverse discrimination
  • operational costs
  • health insurance
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